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BOOK 



PROPHET STEPHEN, 



SON OF DOUGLAS 



WHEREIN MARVELLOUS THINGS ARE FORETOLD OF THE REIGN 
OF ABRAHAM. 



KE \Y YORK : 
FEEKS & BANCKER, 

WHOLESALE NEWSDEALERS AND ' BOOKSELLERS, 

No. 2Cj ANN STREET. 




*~ ' t£*fss./&^ 



. 



Entered according to Act of Congress, in the year 1S63, by 

PEEKS & BANCKER, 

In the Clerk's Office of the District Court of the United States, for the Southern 
District of New York. 



2- 4 $■* 3 



W. II. Tinson, Stereotyper. John J. Reed, Printer. 



V 



f 



" 



PROPHECIES OP STEPHEN, 

SON OF DOUGLAS. 
CHAPTER I. 

1 James the Eunich retvreth and Abraham tJ<e Honest reigneth 
in his stead. 3 King of Woolly -heads, a mighty statesman, 
ceth woodchueks. 4 Re journey eth from 
ike . .6 He r the City of Gotham; offer eth 

to hi ' n. His deeds of unknown valor. 10 He 

calletfifi) '. a fish his 

" purse bearer ," who maketh • een paper. 

1Z Simon the Just Minister of P* \ he putteth 

oxer the sea. 14 1 Hi the law 

rding to of the Icing. 19 A great commotion in 

the land. 21 The inhabits e for peace but 

the i rs of the woolly-headed Dragon refuse. 24 A man 

cometh c : cth the altars of the Temple, 

m getteth drunk and bloweth up the king with a fire- 
cracker. 24 Abranam coveteth, the head of Jeff. 27 Sendeth 
the Pope to slay Mm with bull's. 28 Sends his fiery dragon 
Burnside. 29 Hooker the king's angler goeth forth. 81 Or- 
ders Park the Post Boy to bloio off the heads of 40,000 with 
his horn. 33 Abraham is deceived by his cunning counsellors. 

I. It came to pass in the eighty and fourth year of 
the Republic, that James the Eunich having ruled all 
the days of his appointed time, retired to the shades of 
Wheatland, and Abraham, called the Rail-splitter, 
reigned in his stead. 

II. iNow Abraham was a child of promise, and a 
after the woolly-headed Dragon's own heart ; full 



4: PEOPHECIES OF STEPHEN, 

of exceeding cunning, and beautiful to look upon, as 
the skin of a sheep drawn over the skeleton of a 
gorilla. 

III. Moreover he was a mighty statesman, having, 
withal, had much experience in the matter of rail- 
splitting, flatboating, and cooking woodchucks in the 
Indian wars. 

IV. And behold it came to pass that, on his journey 
from the Far West to the seat of empire, even to the 
place that is called the Capitol, he made divers and 
sundry speeches, of great and marvellous power, inso- 
much that the hills trembled at the sound of his 
voice, and vast scores of little pigs, and jackasses, and 
other beasts of the field, came and gathered about 
him, and were dumb with amazement at the beauty 
and majesty of the king. 

V. And, lo, when he was come to the place that is 
called Gotham, that is built upon the water that is 
over against the land of the Jerseys, he rested for 
the night. And the people came unto him, and took 
him up into the temple of the city, and there gath- 
ered about him men of high and low degree, who were 
curious to look upon the king, to see what manner of 
man he was. 

VI. And the great height of Abraham amazed the 
people, insomuch that a young and daring giant from 
the Aroostook in the land of Maine, boldly challenged 
the king to stand up and measure with him. But the 
king, looking down with pity upon the young man, 
said, !N"o, I will not measure with thee, but if thou 
hast a sister, bring her hither, and her I will kiss. 

VII. And, lo, the people were dumfoundecl at the 
elegance and majesty of the king, and they fell down 

• and worshipped him. 

VIII. And Abraham was also a great general, being 



SOX OF DOUGLAS. 5 

a man mighty in battle, and of such exceeding 
strategy and invisible courage, that he cut his way, by 
night, through a hundred millions of hostile men in 
arms, that lay encamped in the region of country that 
is between the city that is called Harrisburg, and 
Washington, which is so named from the Father of 
his Country, 

IX. Xow, having escaped the bloody legions of his 
imaginary foes, Abraham ascended the throne on the 
fourth day of the third month ; and he summoned 
together the chiefs of his clan, even the mighty men 
of unknown valor and virtue, who gladly came unto 
him and threw themselves at his feet. 

X. And the king said unto William, whose surname 
is Seward, come thou and be my chief trumpeter 
to blow the fame of our kingdom to the four corners 
of the globe, and to make all other kings and poten- 
tates to tremble and flee away before the majesty of 
our power. 

XL And then he called a fish from the great deep, 
which is also called Salmon, being named Chase 
among the natives of the wilderness of Ohio, and he 
said unto him, be thou my purse-bearer ; and as we 
have neither silver nor gold, get thou engravers and 
printers, and blue ink, and red ink, and much green 
paper, and many mighty printing machines withal, 
and let us print money, to astonish the heathen, w T ho 
think that nothing but silver and gold are precious 
metals. 

XII. And next the king appointed Simon, wdio is 
called the Just, to be his minister of peace, and he 
said unto him, Do thou set up our comely black Idol, 
and bid all the people to fall down and worship it ; 
lo, if any refuse, do thou draw forth thy sword, and 
smite them hip and thigh ; for I say unto you that of 



PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN", 

such neither man, woman, nor child shall live in my 
kingdom. And Simon bowed down his head, and 
kissed the hem of the king's garment, and said, My 
lord, I will. 

XIII. Then Abraham sent for one Gideon, whose 
surname is Wells, who is not deep, but is covered 
up with much hair, and he said unto him, Do thou be 
my ruler over the seas ; and get thee speedily a hun- 
dred ships, and prepare thyself to lock up three 
thousand miles of the coast of the heathen who wor- 
ship white deities, lest it enter into their heads that 
they will not fall down before our comely black Idol. 
And Gideon lifted up his beard, and opened . his 
mouth, and said, O king, thy will shall be done. 

XIY. And after this the king sent abroad into the 
Far "West, and summoned into his presence the father 
of many children, who is called Bates, and said unto 
him, Come hither, and sit by my side, and be thou 
the expounder of my laws, which thou shalt interpret 
according to my will, and not after the fashion of the 
books and judges which were before in this land. 
And the father of many children said, Yea, O king, 
thy will is the law. 

XY. Now there dwelt in the land the son of Blair, 
who was called Montgomery, and the king said unto 
his servants, Send hither this man to me, that I may 
make him the chief ruler over all my carriers, wdio 
are to do my will in sending forth such papers as are 
pleasing unto me, and in putting under their feet 
whatever is opposed to the worship of the comely 
black Idol. And the father of the Blairs joyfully 
sent forth his son, even Montgomery, his youngest 
born, to do the bidding of the king. 

XYI. And, lo, when all these things were done ac- 
cording to the pleasure of Abraham the king, he 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 7 

again opened his mouth and said, Now let vis have 
one more man to serve in our name, in the interior of 
our kingdom; and again lie sent forth into the West, 
and found him a man after his own heart : and when 
he had appointed him Minister of the Interior he 
journeyed so far into the interior that his name and 
his exploits have not been heard of, no, not even to 
this day. 

XVII. And it came to pass in those days that there 
was a mighty murmuring ainoi people that 
dwelt towar h, and they loudly demanded 
of the king that he should make known to them, and 
to all the land, whether they were to be treated as 
equals in the family of States, or whether the religion 
of the woolly-headed Dragon and the black Idol were 
to be the law land. 

XVIII. Whereupon the king was filled with exceeding 
digni auch that he swelled up to four times the 
size thai \. ivenient to his skin. But he i 

not a word, neither would he condescend to have any 
intercourse with the heathen who worship white 
deities. 

XIX. And when the land was full of trouble, and 
the hearts of wise men were smitten with dread, the 
mighty men of the nation came together, from the 
North and from the South, from the East and from the 
West, and sat down in council together, as was the 
custom in those days. But the black fiend had taken 
possession of the people that dwelt in the Northland, 
so that they could do nothing to appease the fiery 

ir of the people that inhabited the region that lies 
to the south of the city that is called Washington. 

XX. Now there were wise and good men in those 
days, who said, Let us go forth to save our country, 
that the men of the North and they of the South may 



8 

still dwell together in unity, for our fathers were 
brethren. 

XXI. And the wise men of the South stood up in 
the council of the nation, and said, I pray you let us 
settle this, our trouble, in peace. You men of the 
North take for yourselves and your black Idol, all the 
land that lies to the west of the line that is called 
after the old name of Missouri, that runneth even to 
the shores of the Pacific Ocean ; and we men of the 
South will take the little of the public domain that 
lieth to the south of that line: and we will dwell to- 
gether as our fathers did, buying and selling and being 
one people forever and ever. 

XXII. These things did John, surnamed Crittenden, 
a mighty man from the Southland of Kentucky, offer 
to the inhabitants of the North, in the name of the 
people of the South. 

XXIII. But, lo, the warriors of King Abraham 
all stood up as one man, and smote their breasts, 
and tore out their hair, and made such noises as time 
affordeth not to mention, swearing withall, that they 
would have peace on no terms that did not ensure the 
universal worship of the comely black Idol. 

XXIV. And in those days came a man out of the 
Tombs, from the South, and smote the altars in the 
temple of the Nation with his fist, swearing that they 
of the South and of the North should be two people 
forever. 

XXY. And there followed after him a crazy man, 
who was called Wigfall, because he was often drunken, 
insomuch that he lost the natural equilibrium of his 
body, and suffered the artificial covering to his cranium 
to fall prone to the ground. He, too, was full of 
wrath, and threatened to blow up the king with a fire- 
cracker. 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 9 

XXVI. But the greatest of the chiefs of the South 
was the son of Davis, who was called Jeff, whose head 
the king coveted ; for he showed himself great in skill 
to govern, and wonderful in the arts of war. 

XXVII. Insomuch that when the king sent forth the 
Pope to devour the hosts of Jeff, and to eat them up 
alive, according to the bulls he should publish against 
them, they neither feared, nor did they stand in awe, 
but came out in great force, and caused the Pope to 
flee for his life ; and the place was thereafter called 
Bull Kun, by reason of the marvellous flight of the 
Pope. 

XXVIII. And Abraham was discomforted; but, no- 
thing daunted, he commanded his fiery Dragon, which 
was called BurnsioZe, to go forth and burn up the armies 
of the heathen, that worship white deities, root and 
branch. And, behold, when the fiery Dragon, even 
the all-destroying Bumside, was come into their coun- 
try, they threw great tanks of cold water upon him, 
insomuch that they utterly quenched him ; so that he 
came back like a drowned chicken, and roosted in a 
chamber in the palace of the king. 

XXIX. Now the king bethought himself of a terri- 
ble and mighty angler among his warriors, which was 
called Hooker, because that he knew how to hoak ; 
and him he sent forth, saying, Get thee over into the 
land of the heathen, and put me a hook into the noses 
of all the rebels, and lead them hither unto me, that I 
may kill them, every one, and be avenged of the 
wrongs that they have done unto me. 

XXX. And when he had reached the southmost 
bank of the river that is called Chickahominy, the 
heathen looked upon him and saw what manner of 
man he was, and they laughed one to another ; and, 
in their evil conceits, they sent forth an army of boots, 

1* 



10 PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN, 

that kicked the hindermost parts of the king's fighting 
angler, and drove his rearguard even into the trenches 
that lie before the gates of the temple of the Dragon. 

XXXI. Xow Abraham, the king, was sore oppressed, 
because the heathen had kicked the hindermost parts 
of his mighty lighting angler ; and he smote the earth 
until it quaked. And then he called unto him his faith- 
ful Post-boy, who is called Park, the son of Godwin, 
and he said unto him : The heathen have despised the 
Pope, and they have quenched my mighty, flaming 
Dragon, that is called Burnside, and they have kicked 
the hindermost parts of Hooker, the king's own angler ; 
now, therefore, do thou bring forth thine horn, and 
point its larger end straight at the heathen, and blow 
me a blast that shall blow off the heads of forty thou- 
sand. 

XXXII. Now, the king's Post-boy was mighty of 
wind, so that he did even as he was bidden by the 
king; and, lo, he blew such a blast on his horn as 
astounded the heathen, yea, as blew the scat of his 
own nether garment into a thousand pieces, yea, inta 
a hundred thousand pieces; and the like of it was 
never known, no, not since the beginning of the 
world. 

XXXIII. And, behold, when the king saw that his 
mighty, windy Post-boy had not blown off the head of 
a single rebel, but instead thereof had blown himself 
to pieces, he was full of great grief, and of great 

ii, and, lifting up his eyes to the heavens, he ex- 
claimed: Art thou, then, in the name of a thousand 
devils, on the side of the heathen ? and is it thus that 
thou tightest for the comely black Idol, even for thine 
own clinch of the woolly-headed Dragon \ 

XXXI V. And Abraham was smitten with amaze- 
ment because his warriors had told him that speedily, 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 11 

yea, in ninety days, the hosts of the heathen should be 
blown away, as chaff before a mighty North, wind ; 
and, behold, nothing had come to pass according to the 
promise of his cunning counsellors and many mighty 
warriors. So Abraham hid his face in his mantle and 
was ashamed. 



CHAPTER II. 

2 Stephen the Prophet standeth up in tlic temple, and denounceth 
the worshipped of the wooll Dragon — lie showeth that 

they want war. 3 The icorshlppers of the Dragon gnash their 
teeth at the P, 5 The warriors of the Icing shed the Mood 

of millions in their speeches. G They fain would destroy the 
Prophet by the Mowing of rams' horns. 7 The Prophet showeth 
them that wa ■ ion. 8 lie chargeth them with a design- 

to destroy their country. 9 He provcth that all tyrants set vp 
their claim to prove that they have a government. 10 The 
Prophet showeth that a wise nation goetk not to war with its 
own people. 11 He showeth that the chief government hath no 
right to use the army, except according to law, to aid the civil 
power. VI He telleth the truth concerning Fort Sumter. 13 
He prove th that Peace is the only policy that can save the 
country. 

I. ISTow just before those days appeared Stephen 
the Prophet, who was also called Douglas, a mighty 
man in the councils of the nation, and beloved of the 
people ; but hated by the king, because he had met him 
in the Westland, where the Prophet had proclaimed 
aloud the abominations of the woolly-headed Dragon, 
named by King Abraham — the comely Hack Idol. 

II. And Stephen the Prophet stood up in the coun- 
cil of the nation, even in the Senate chamber, and, 
pointing his finger at the partisans of the king, cried out 
with a loud voice, saying : You want war, because you 



12 PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN, 

think that war will chive off the South and leave every- 
thing here to the mercy of your hands. 

III. And the partisans of the king, even Sumner, 
the pupil of Demosthenes, who stealetli the orations 
of his master, and Wade, called by Yaliandigliam the 
coward who wadeth up to his loins in the blood lie 
hath not the pluck to shed himself, and all the hosts of 
the king, gnashed their teeth at the Prophet, and fain 
would have stoned him, but that they knew that the 
people loved him. 

IY. And the king was exceeding wroth, and sent 
for his chief warriors, even for William Pitt, who was 
called Fessenden, from the land of Maine, and said 
unto him, This seditious Stephen the Prophet is an 
offence unto me. He has been my evil genius even in 
the land of Illinois, where he proclaimed these infamous 
words in my own ears: " 1 hold that this Government 
was made on the white basis, by white men, for the 
benefit of white men, and their posterity, forever" 
Therefore, O ye warriors of mine, be sure that some- 
how you bring to naught this stiff-necked prophet, him 
and his doctrines. 

Y. Then all the fuglemen of the king, even the val- 
liant warriors who shed the blood of millions of men 
in their speeches in the temple, put their heads together 
to see how they should confound Stephen the Prophet. 

VI. And, lo, they agreed that they would bring him 
down, as the walls of Jericho were brought down, by 
the blowing of rams' horns ; and straightway they all 
began to blow at Stephen, until a mighty roaring wind 
shook the windows of the temple, and rilled the spec- 
tators with fear, insomuch, that fair women left the 
galleries in much trembling, and the old men said that 
such things had not been seen, no, not since the begin 
ning of the Republic. 



SOX OF DOUGLAS. 13 

VII. Now, after all these things, Stephen came forth 
and opened his mouth and said unto them, Do you 
think to confound the people with noise ? Do you 
hope to save the Union by war ? Verily, I say unto 
you that 

" War is disunion. War is final, eternal separation. 
Hence, disguise it as you may, every Union man in 
America must advocate such amendments to the Con- 
stitution as will preserve peace and restore the Union ; 
while every disunionist, whether openly or secretly 
plotting its destruction, is the advocate of peaceful 
secession, or of war, as the surest means of rendering 
reunion and reconstruction impossible. 1 have too 
much respect for any man that has standing enough to 
be elected a Senator, to believe that he is for war, as a 
means for preserving the Union, I have too much 
respect for his intellect to believe, for one moment, 
that there is a man for war who is not a disunionist 
p>er se. Hence I do not mean, if I can prevent it, that 
the enemies of the Union — men plotting to destroy it — 
shall drag this country into war under the pretext of 
protecting the public property, and enforcing the laws, 
and collecting revenue, when their object is disunion, 
and war the means of accomplishing a cherished 
purpose." 

VIII. And while Stephen thus spake, the followers 
of the woolly-headed Dragon, even the warriors of the 
king, were tilled full of anger as a coal, yea, as a live 
coal is of fire, and they raved at him ; but Stephen 
heeded not their anger, neither did he fear them, but 
continued saying unto them : 

" The disunionists, therefore, are divided into two 
classes; the one open, the other secret disunionists. 
The one in favor of peaceful secession and a recog- 
nition of independence ; the other is in, favor of war, 



14 PR0FHECIE3 OF STEPHEN, 

as the surest means of accomplishing the object, and of 
making the separation final, eternal. I am a Union 
man, ccncl hence against war" 

IX. Behold, when the Prophet had uttered "these 
words, the Pitt of the Senate chamber w T as stirred up 
with exceeding wrath, and demanded to know if the 
king should not stretch forth his hand, even the hand 
of his power, to show that there is a government in 
this land ? And the Prophet answered the clamors of 
the Pitt, saying : 

" But we are told, and we hear it repeated every- 
where, that vie must find out if we have got a govern- 
ment. ' Have we a government V is the question; and 
we are told we must test that question by using the 
military power to put down all discontented spirits. 
Sir, this question, '* have %oe a government f has been 
pronounced by every tyrant who has tried to keep his 
feet on the necks of the people since the world begem. 
When the barons demanded Magna Charta from King 
John, at Runnymede, he exclaimed, ' have we a govern- 
ment V and called for his army to put down the dis- 
contented barons. When Charles 1. attempted to collect 
the ship money in violation of the constitution of 
England, and in disregard of the rights of the people, 
and was resisted by them, he exclaimed, ' have we a 
government f We cannot treat with rebels ; put down 
the traitors / we must show that %oe have a government? 
When James II. was driven from the throne of Eng- 
land for trampling on the liberties of the people, he 
called for his army, and exclaimed, 'let us show that 
we have a government /' When Geor-ge III. called 
upon his army to put down the rebellion in America, 
lord North cried lustily, ' no compromise with 
traitors; let us demonstrate that we have a govern- 
ment? When, in 1848, the people rose upon their 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 



15 



tyrants all over Europe, and demanded guarantees for 

their rights, every crowned head exclaimed, 'have we a 
government V and appealed to the army to vindicate 
their authority and to enforce the law." 

X. Now these words of the Prophet Stephen only 
the more stirred up the worshippers of the black Idol 
to an evil and revengeful spirit, but he continued to 
rebuke them, saying : 

" Sir, the history of the world does not fail to con- 
demn the folly, weakness, and wickedness of that 
government which drew its sword upon its own people 
when they demanded guarantees for their rights. This 
cry, that ive must have a government, is merely follow- 
ing the example of the besotted Bourbon, who never 
learned anything by misfortune, never forgave an 
injury, never forgot an affront. Must we demonstrate 
that ive have got a government, and coerce obedience 
without reference to the justice or injustice of the com- 
plaints f Sir, whenever ten million people proclaim to 
you, with one unanimous voice, thai they apprehend 
cheir rights, their firesides, and their family altars are 
in danger, it becomes a wise government to listen to the 
appeal, and to remove tJie apprehension. History does 
not record cm example where any human government 
has been strong enough to crush ten million people into 
subjection when they believe their rights and liberties 
were imperiled, without first converting the government 
itself into a despotism, and destroying the last vestige 
of freedom. 

" Let us take warning from the examples of the past. 

Wherever a government has refused to listen to the 

complaints of the people, and attempted to put down 

their murmurs by the bayonet, they have paid the 

penalty" 

XL Moreover, said the Prophet, continuing to ex- 



16 

pose the wickedness or foolishness of the unlawful 
plans of the king and his warriors : 

" But we are told that the President is going to 
enforce the laws in the seceded States. How f By 
calling out the militia and using the army and navy ! 
These terms are used as freely and as flippantly as if 
we were a military government where martial law was 
the only rule of action, and the will of the monarch 
was the only law on the subject. Sir, the President 
cannot .use the army, or the navy, or the militia, for 
any jnnpose not authorized by lata. What is that f If 
there he an insurrection in any State against laws and 
authorities thereof, the President can use the military 
to put it down only when called upon by the State 
Legislature, if it be in session, or, if it cannot he con- 
vened, by the Governor. He cannot interfere except 
whien requested. If, on the contrary, the insurrection 
he against the laws of the United States instead of a 
State, then the President can use the military only as 
a posse comitatus in aid of the marshal in such cases 
as are so extreme that judicial aut7writy and the powers 
of the marshal cannot put down the obstruction. The 
military cannot he used in any case whatever except in 
the aid of civil process to assist the mar shed to execute 
a, writ." 

Xlh And when Stephen had finished these words, 
he opened his mouth again to persuade the worship- 
pers of the woolly -headed Dragon, that they should 
make satisfaction to the men that dwell in Sunland, 
jaying : 

" If we consider this question calmly, and make such 
intendments as loill convince the people of the SoutJiem 
States that they are safe and secure in their person, in 
their property, and in their family relations, within 
the Union, we can restore and preserve it. If we can- 



SOX- OF DOUGLAS. 17 

not satisfy the people of the border States that they may 
remain in the Union with safety, dissolution is inevi- 
table. Then the simple question comes back, what shall 
be the policy of the Union men of this country f Shall 
it be peace, or shall it be war f What man in all 
America, with a heart in his bosom, who knows the 
facts connected with Fort Sumter, can hesitate in say- 
ing that duty, honor, patriotism, humanity, require 
that Anderson and his gallant band should be instantly 
withdrawn t Sir, I am not afraid to say so. 1 would 
scorn to take a party ccdvantage or manufacture parti- 
san capital out of an act of patriotism" 

XIII. And thus the Prophet pleaded that they 
should be at peace with their brethren in Snnland : 

" Peace is the only policy that can save the country. 
Let peace be proclaimed as the policy, and you will 
find that a thrill of joy will animate the heart of every 
patriot in the land ; confidence will be restored, / busi- 
ness will be revived / joy will gladden every heart; 
bonfires will blaze upon the hill-tops and in the valleys, 
and the church bells to ill proclaim the glad tidings in 
every city, town and village in America, and the 
applause of a grateful people will greet you everywhere. 
Proclaim the policy of war, and there will be gloom 
and sadness and despair pictured upon the face of every 
patriot in the land. A war of kind?*ed, family and 
friends / father against son, mother against daughter, 
brother against brother, to subjugate one-half of this 
country into obedience to the other half ; if you do not 
mean this, if you mean peace, let this be adopted, and 
give the President the opportunity, through the Secre- 
tary of War, to speak the word ' peace f and thirty 
million people will bless him with their prayers, and 
lionor him, with their shouts of joy." 

XIY. And these were the hist words spoken by the 



18 PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN, 

Prophet in the council of the nation ; for he never 
returned more to behold the abomination of desolation 
which should fall upon its altars, by reason of the 
treason and bullishness of the worshippers of the 
Dragon. 



CIIAPTEK III. 

1 The Prophet rctiretli to his oic-n hired house and teacJicth the 
people that come unto him. 2 The Angel of Peace appeareth 
unto him and showeth the abominations of the uoollij -headed 
Dragon. 4 He prophesieth of 'the desolation of 'the I in I. 7 The 
Angel of Peace shoiceth him out of the Prophet Jeremiah that 
an evil shall spring out of the North that shall spoil the ichoU 
kind. 10 He showeth from Jeremiah that the 2>astors of the 
churches shall become brutish, and be destroyed. 11 He shoioeth 
that the people shall tal'e vengeance of the false judges. 12 He 
shoiceth out of Jeremiah that the judges shall become false and 
judge not according to the law, but according to the will of the 
Icing. 14 He pjrophesietli that the abomination of desolation 
shall last as long as Abraham ruleth. 

I. And, behold, when Stephen had denounced the 
strong men, and all the warriors of the woolly -headed 
Dragon in the temple, he went apart by himself into a 
secret place, even into his own hired house. And 
there came much people unto him, such as were of 
pure heart and loved the land of their fathers, and he 
opened his mouth and taught them, saying : 

II. Harken unto me, O ye people ; for at mid-clay 
the An^el of Peace came down with a o T eat light out 

O ■ S3 S3 

of the heavens, and said unto me : Stephen, the son 
of Douglas, what seest thou i And I said, I see a 
woolly-headed Dragon, whose tail and hinderinost parts 
are in the North, but from his mouth goeth out forked 



PON OF DOUGLAS. 19 

lightnings unci hot flame, that rageth even towaras the 
South. 

III. Again a great rushing light came before my 
eyes, and the Angel of Peace said, "What seest thou ? 
And I said : I see a seething-pot, and around about it 
standing the giants of Abraham, the mighty king of 
the Woolly-heads. 

IV. Then the Angel smote the cloud of smoke with 
his rod, and said: Behold, O Stephen, the seething-pot 
is thy country, and the giants round about, even the 
warriors of the woolly-headed Dragon, shall ravage thy 
fields and bring desolation and famine upon ail the 
land. There shall not be one stone in the foundations 
of the Temple of Liberty that shall not be thrown 
down. Neither habeas corpus, nor trial bv jury, nor 
any other thing that thy fathers gave thee shall be left 
for thee and for thy children, so long as Abraham, the 
king of the Woolly-heads, reigneth. 

Y. And thy sons shall be slain in battle, their child- 
ren shall cry for bread, and the mourners shall go about 
the streets, when there shall be none to pity them ; for 
the woolly-headed Dragon shall harden the hearts of 
his people, that they shall not hear the cries of the 
widows and the orphans that they have made. 

VI. And in those days beggars, and such as are 
called thieves, shall become rich men. They shall wax 
fat, and kick at whomsoever will not fall down and 
worship the black Idol. So they that were beggars and 
serving men shall dwell in palaces, and shall fill their 
bellies with strong drinks and hot meats, and swell up 
with great pride and much wind, until they shall be 
known in the whole region round about for their inso- 
lence and much stinking. 

VII. Then about the second hour of the third watch 
of the night the Angel of Peace came unto me the 



20 PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN, 

v 

second time, holding a Bible in his hand, and he 
opened to the hook of the Prophet Jeremiah, and said 
unto me, Read ; and I opened my eyes and read these 
words : " Then said the Lord unto me, out of the North 
an evil shall break forth upon all the inhabitants of 
the land.". 

YIIL And the Angel turned over a leaf in the book 
of the Prophecy of Jeremiah, and said unto me, Now 
open thine eyes and read what thou seest ; and I be- 
held these words : " My bowels, my bowels ! 1 am 
pained at my very heart ; my heart maketh a noise in 
me; I cannot hold my peace, because thou hast heard, 
O my soul, the sound of the trumpet, the alarm of 
war. Destruction upon destruction is cried, for the 
whole land is spoiled ; suddenly are my tents spoiled, 
and my curtains in a moment. For my people is fool- 
ish, they have not known me ; they are sottish child- 
ren, and they have none understanding ; they are wise 
to do evil, but to do good they have no knowledge. 
And when thou art spoiled, what wilt thou do ? Though 
thou clothest thyself with crimson, though thou deck- 
est thee with ornaments of gold — thy lovers will des- 
pise thee, they will seek thy life." 

IX. And then I said in my heart, Behold, O my 
people, in these words of the Prophet Jeremiah, what 
woe shall be visited upon this our land, because of the 
rule of Abraham and the giants of the woolly-headed 
Dragon. 

X. Again the Angel of Peace turned over a leaf in 
the book of the Prophet Jeremiah, and said unto me, 
Open thine eyes and read, and I read : " The priests 
said not, where is the Lord ? the pastors transgressed 
against me, and the prophets prophesied by Baal, and 
walked after things that do not profit. For the pas- 
tors are become brutish, and have not sought the Lord ' 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 21 

therefore they shall not prosper, and their flocks shall 
be scattered." 

XL And, lo, when I read these things out of the 
Prophet Jeremiah, my heart was sore within me, and 
mine eyes were full of tears, for I knew that the priests 
of this land should become brutish, that the blessed 
altars of peace should be changed into butcher's sham- 
bles, and war, revenge and blood should stream forth 
from the desecrated places of religion. By reason of 
these things I saw that the churches should be broken 
up, and that the sons of Anack and Belial, who are 
also called after the names of Beecher, Cheever and 
Tyng, should corrupt the hearts of the pastors, until 
they all become brutish together, and walk in the fiery 
paths with the children of perdition. Yerily I say 
unto you, the end of these wolves in sheep's clothing 
shall be that of the ungodly, and their names shall be 
stricken out of the Book of Life. Their carcasses shall 
be devoured by the eagles, and the young eagles shall 
pick out their eyes ; the bittern shall eat the flesh of 
their bones, and the lizzard shall hatch its young in 
the hollow of their skulls. For they have not bark- 
ened to the voice of peace, neither would they heed 
the commandments of the Prince of Peace. 

XII. And I lifted up my eyes, and behold, the 
Angel of Peace was still standing before me, witli the 

■first finger of his right hand pointing to another pas- 
sage in the book of the Prophecy of Jeremiah, and he 
commanded me to read, and I read these words : " And 
they that handle the law know me not." And the 
Angel dropt his head upon his breast and wept. 

XIII. Then, ah woe is me, I knew that the judges 
of this land would also be led astray by the green 
charms of the woolly-headed Dragon, and that they 
wpuld no longer judge according to the law and the 



22 PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN, 

testimony, as was the custom of our fathers, "but ac- 
cording to the will of the kins:. 

XI Y. And when I lifted up niy eyes, behold the 
Angel still was weeping, and his face was bowed even 
to the ground ; which showed unto me that this the 
corruption of the judges of the land was the sorest 
calamity that could overtake a free people. Then I 
cried aloud in my despair. I said : O Lord, is this 
people lost? How long shall the perjured judges es- 
cape the vengeance of the people? How long are 
these clays of our humiliation and shame ? And sud- 
denly there appeared a black cloud before my eyes, 
in the midst of which these words were written in let- 
ters as red as name: u Behold, as long as Abraham 
and the woolly-headed Dragon bear rule" 

XV. And I said, How long, O Angel of Peace, shall 
it be to the end of these days of our abomination, even 
to the end of the rule of Abraham and the worship- 
pers of the black Idol? Then the Angel lifted up his 
head, and I saw that his eyes were sad, and sorrow 
covered his face as a garment, but he answered not a 
word ; and, behold, in the midst of a great and shining 
light he ascended up into the heavens, and I covered 
my face with my mantle, for I was sore with grief and 
stricken in heart with much grief. 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 23 



CHAPTER IY. 

2 The Prophet showeth out of the Booh of Jeremiah that the 
woolly-headed Dragon shall put a lying spirit into the minds 
of the people. 4 The worshippers of the Mack Idol shall per- 
seeute and imprison tie worshippers of the white a 
5 The hypocrites shall leave the temple of the white d 
and go out into the temple of the blade Idol, and come 
loaded with the green jewels of the Dragon. 6 Daniel the son 
of Dick, shall get into a den of thieves. 8 The building of 
th l Vie of Janus.half way letween the temple of the 

w } lte de> ' that- of the Much Idol-Peter, the son of 

<ger and the Dean, of Richmond. 9 Elijah, the War Horse 
turned into a donkey in the dirt-carts of the King 11 The 
r ;:!^ r & the ! *ers ascendeth like an eagle and lighteth 

like a dove-The Dean of Richmond buildeth him a chicken- 
coop behind t: of Janus. 12 The people shall plot to 
destroy the Temple of J, 

I. Now it came t on the third day of the 
sixth month, at about the middle of the first watch of 
the night, that the Ang LCe came unto me the 

I time, bearing in his hand the book of the 
Prophet Jeremiah, which was open at the seventh 
chapter, and he said unto me, Arise, O Stephen the 
son of Douglas, for I have that for thee to read that 
shall tell thee what is to befall thy land before the 
end of the reign of Abraham the king of the Woolly- 
heads. J 

II. Then I arose, and looked into the book of the 
prophet that was in the hand of the Angel, and read 
these words : « But thou shalt say unto them that this 
is a nation that obeyeth not Hie voice of the Lord 
their God, nor receiveth correction: truth is perished, 
and is cut off from their mouth. And they bend their 
tongues like their bows for lies. 5 ' 

Ill And then I knew, O my people, that the fol 



24: PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN, 

lowers of the woolly-headed Dragon should destroy 
and utterly spoil this land with their lying tongues, 
which should breecf evil surmisings, and discontent, 
and slanderous reports, and all manner of lying 
abominations, until tifere should be no soundness, no, 
nor any truth left among the people. 

IV. Moreover, it appeared unto my vision, that 
the worshippers of the black Idol shall persecute 
and say all manner of things falsely against the wor- 
shippers of the white deities ; insomuch that they shall 
be stoned in the streets, and be led to prison to be 
devoured of the vermin of the woolly-headed Dragon, 
and suffer violence at the hands of the Woolly-heads, 
because they will not fall down to worship the black 
Idol of the king. 

Y. And in those days fearfulness shall seize upon 
ail the hypocrites that have crept for a cover into the 
temple of the white deities, and they shall run out in 
the train of the woolly-headed Dragon, and shall pros- 
trate themselves before the black Idol, and swear like 
that Judas whose bowels gushed out, that they never 
knew the white deities. x\nd these shall come back 
loaded with the green charms of the woolly-headed 
Dragon. 

VI. And the greatest of the apostates from the 
temple of the white deities shall be Daniel, the son 
of Dick ; not that Daniel that was in the lion's de«, 
but that other Daniel, that got himself into a den of 
thieves, and took the Scriptures down with him, and 
quoted them, to the great delight of the harlequins 
that dance before the black Idol in the temple of the 
Dragon. 

YII. Now in those days many shall fall away from 
the truth by reason of fear, who shall not go over to 
the temple of the woolly-headed Dragon, nor will 
they dare to remain wholly in the temple of the white 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 25 

deities, but shall go out midway. between the two, and 
shall make their benedictions first to the one and then 
to the other, looking two ways at the same time, like 
the heathen gods in the temple of J inns. 

VIII. Among such as these shall be Peter, not that 
Peter who denied his master once in Judea, but Peter, 
the son of Cagger, who denied his principles a thou- 
sand times in the land of the Knickerbockers ; and 
with him also the great Dean of Kichmond,yCalled 
the Profane, of whose riches and cunning manoeuver- 
ing there is no end ; and these shall build a new tem- 
ple of Janus, and many are they that shall come 
therein to worship. 

IX. And these shall take Elijah, called the War 
Horse, and they shall turn him into a donkey, and 
shall make him to draw dirt in the dirt-carts of Abra- 
ham the king of the Woolly-heads, whereby they 
shall get great gain to themselves, and shall enrich 
themselves, even with the green charms of the Dra- 
gon. 

X. Now a great ruler shall arise in those days, 
to whom the people shall look for deliverance from 
the power of the Dragon, and to him shall be given 
the name of See More, because it shall be believed 
that he hath the gift of seeing further than other men, 
even than the cunning king Abraham, of whose wis- 
dom no man shall know, no, not to the end of time. 

XL And this great ruler shall rise before the peo- 
ple like a mighty eagle, and he shall soar proudly up, 
and fly very high, and spread his broad wings over 
the whole continent, insomuch that there shall be a 
great' fluttering among the chickens of the Dragon ; 
but when the king of the Woolly-heads, who is a cun- 
ning archer, shall come forth with his bow and arrow, 
this proud eagle shall subside as gently as a cooing 

2 



26 PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN", 

dove, and gracefully light in a chicken-coop, which the 
great Dean of Richmond shall cause to be built a 
hundred and twenty cubits back of the new temple of 
Janus. 

XII. Lo, there shall be great murmuring and much 
indignation among the - people, and they shall smite 
their breasts and demand, Who shall deliver us from 
the power of the Dragon, and from the tyranny of 
Abraham the king of the Woolly-heads ? And they 
shall plan among themselves how they shall destroy 
the new temple of Janus, by means of which so many 
worshippers are drawn away from the temple of the 
white deities, and carried off half-way over to the 
temple of the black Idol. 



CHAPTER V. 

1 The Gothamites shall murmur against their Watchmen because 
they take brides from the King of the Woolly-heads. 2 They 
send for See More to come over and help them. 3 He scndeth 
his man Friday, Waterberry the Valiant. 5 The man Friday 
gathereth three ship loads of proof against the Watchmen, and 
See More sweareth that the Watchmen shall die. 6 Great joy 
among the Gothamites — every man Msseth his neighbor's wife 
for joy. 7 The Watchmen escape the vengeance of the Ruler 
of the Knickerbockers. 9 The People murmur and smite the 
Ruler of the Knickerbockers, because he deceived them. 10 The 
Prophet foretells the death of all the worshippers in the Temple 
of Janus. 12 He warns the people to beware of The World 
which guideth the people into the Temple of Janus, and 
showeth that its heart is like Marble, and its blood like thai 
of a Halibut. 13 He warneth against false Judges, such as 
Daly defile the Temple of Justice. 14 He warneth against 
Lawyers who plead for the black Idol for hire. 

I. And in those days shall be great murmuring 
among the people of Gotham, a city that is builded by 



EON OF DOUGLAS. 27 

the waters over against the land of the Jerseys, because 
of the impurity and wickedness of their watchmen, who 
shall rebel against the people their master?, and shall 
take bribes from the king of the Woolly-heads, by 
means of which great and scandalous wroi LI be 

committed against the liberty and peace of the Gotham- 
ites. 

II. And they shall say to the mighty ruler of the 
Knickerbockers, who is also called See More, We pray 
thee to come over and help us, and to defend us and 
our children from the machinations of the evil dis- 
posed watchmen, who have sold themselves to the 
worshipper of the woolly-headed Dragon. 

III. And he shall send his man Friday, who is called 
Waterberry, by reason of his head looking like a small 
berry gri top of a tall water-weed, a man 
vrdiant in his own conceit, who shall never be known 
to covet anything that belongeth not to another, nor 
to take anything that lieth beyond the reach of his 
hand, whose honesty no man shall see, nor shall any 
man comprehend it to the end of time. 

IV. Behold, the mighty ruler of the Knickerbockers 
shall say to this man, Get thee down to the Gotham- 
ites, and bring me back a faithful record of the abomi- 
nations of the watchmen, that I may revenge the 
people of the wrongs that they have suffered at their 
hands. 

Y. And, lo, the man Friday, even he that -is called 
Waterberry, shall go down to the city of Gotham, and 
shall gather up testimony against the faithless watch- 
men, that shall fill a hundred thousand volumes, and 
shall take them back in three ships to the ruler of the 
Knickerbockers, who shall swear in his wrath that the 
watchmen shall die. 

VI. And he shall smite the mountains and they 
shall tremble at his nod, and the sea shall roar, and the 



28 PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN, 

birds of the air shall fall dead with fright ; and the 
people of Gotham shall rejoice with exceeding joy, 
insomuch that every man shall kiss his neighbor's wife, 
because they shall be delivered from the hands of the 
faithless watchmen. 

YII. But I say unto you, that the mountains shall 
tremble, and the sea roar, and the birds die, and the 
other men's wives shall be kissed in vain, for the 
watchmen shall not die, neither shall they be driven 
out by the mighty ruler of the Knickerbockers ; for 
behold, he barketh like a clog, but runneth like a hare. 

VIII. And the people shall become sick at heart, 
for they shall see their hopes perish, and shall find 
none to deliver them from the hands of Abraham the 
king, nor from the malice of the worshippers of the 
woolly-headed Dragon. 

IX. And they shall smite the ruler of the Knick- 
erbockers until he die, so that he shall not be king, 
according to the promise of the worshippers in the 
temple of Janus. 

X. Moreover, I say unto you, that all who follow 
the hypocrites into the temple of Janus shall die ; 
for they have forsaken the temple of the white deities, 
and turned their faces away from the altars that were 
builded by their fathers. 

XI. And all the men of this world shall die, because 
The World shall deceive them and lead them astray 
from the paths of truth, unto the temple of the heathen, 
even the new temple of Janus. 

XII. Give ear and hearken unto me, O ye worship- 
pers of the white deities, be ye not mixed up with the 
followers of The World, for it is a wolf in sheep's 
clothing; it hath been the herald of the king of the 
Woolly-heads, and was taken by the Bohemians, for 
hire, over into the temple of Janus, where it boweth 
from afar to the white deities, while its heart is far from 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 29 

it. It knoweth not Democracy, neither understandeth 
it the worship of the white deities, for it hath a heart 
like Marble, and its blood is like that of a Halibut. 

XIII. Beware, also, of false judges, and such as 
Daly defile the altars of justice with sacrifices to the 
black Idol by reason of the green charms of the woolly 
headed Dragon. 

XIY. Moreover, I say unto you, shun the council 
of lawyers, who sell their country to the black Idol foi 
the green charms of the Dragon. JBrade-he never so 
fair a web of cunningly devised falsehoods to hide his 
treachery to the white deities, believe him not ; neither 
suffer thyself to be drawn into the ways of his foot- 
steps ; for his paths are filthy with lucre, and he getteth 
fat with the fees of sin. From such turn away. 



CHAP TEE YL 

1 The Prophet showcth out of Jeremiah that Benjamin, the king's 
Butler, shall plunder the City of Orleans. 3 lie shall be called 
the Bruit, and sh ill treat the mothers of children like harlots. 
4 His officers shall take concubines of the Ethiopians, and dwell 
in the mansions of the rich. 5 The Tost-boy of Gotham shall 
trumpet the praise of Benjamin the Bruit. Q The King is 
offended at his Butler because he hordcth the gold which he 
stealeth — he putteih Nathaniel the dancing-master in his place. 
7 The Angel of Peace showeth out of Jeremiah that those who 
have called green paper money shall die as the fool. 11 He 
shoiceth that those who think they have money as a dog hath fleas 
are without riches. 12 He shoiceth the people the mountain of 
debt which the king's purse-bearer shall build. 14 He showeth 
that the people shall scatter the riches which the worshippers of 
the Dragon made out of green paper, so that their children shall 
beg bread in the streets. 

I. Now it came to pass on the seventh day of the 
eislith month, the same being the fifth month of the 



30 

reign of Abraham, the son of Inlow, whose mother 
was of the Ethiopian tribe of Hanks, that the Angel 
of Peace appeared unto me the fourth time, holding in 
his left hand the book of the Prophet Jeremiah ; and 
he said unto me,' Arise, O Stephen, and make thine 
eyes familiar with these words of the twentieth chapter 
and twenty-second verse of the Prophet; and I read 
after this manner : " Behold, the noise of the bruit is 
come, and a great commotion out of the North country, 
to make the cities desolate, and a den of dragons. . . 
"When I had fed them to the full, they then committed 
adultery, and assembled themselves by troops in the 
harlots' houses. They were as fed horses in the morn- 
ing; every one neighed after his neighbor's wife. Shall 
I not visit them for these things ? saith the Lord, and 
shall not my soul be avenged on such a nation as this ?" 

II. And as I read these words out of the book of the 
Prophet, lo, the Angel of Peace was sore oppressed, 
insomuch that his whole frame shook with horror : and 
then I saw what must befall the city that is called 
New, and that beareth also the name of Orleans, that 
is built by the shore of the father of waters, afar off, 
in the land that lieth to the south of the habitation of 
the woolly-headed Dragon. 

III. And I said, This is a doomed city ; for the king 
of the Woolly-heads, even Abraham, the son of Inlow, 
shall send Benjamin, his Butler, who shall also be 
called " the Bruit," as is given in the Prophet Jere- 
miah ; and he shall enter in and dwell there, and the 
inhabitants thereof shall flee before his hand as from a 
pestilence ; for he shall order his soldiers to go out, 
every one of them, to plunder the people, and to treat 
all the fair women, even such as are the mothers of 
children, as harlots. 

IY. Now the officers and soldiers of Benjamin, w 
is called the Bruit, shall do even as they are b 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 31 

and they shall drive out the inhabitants from their 

own dwellings, and take to themselves comely black 

concubines of the Ethiopian tribes that abound in those 

■ and they shall en ■ " is of the 

rich and dwell there, eating and drinking and making 

y in their he 

And the kings Butler, even Benjamin the Bruit, 

shall nourish like a green bay tree, and shall become 

rich beyond other men by reason of plundering the 

people of the city; and his fame shall spread abroad 

throughout the land, a unto Gotham, where a 

rboj shall trumpet his praise afar to all such as 

love much stealing, and to every one that hath a 

liekei ds the fair and fragrant daughters 

of Ethiopia. 

VI. But it shall come to pass that the king shall 
become wroth with Butler, because, 

while he stealeth many hundred pounds of gold, he 
cunni it in his own house, and never bring- 

eth, i • ounce, into the temple 

ofthewo( adedDra ore the king shall 

say unto his Butler, Now, get thee out of this city, for 
I will no more of thee ; and I will put my faithful 
servant Nathaniel, the dancing-master, who is the son 
of Banks, into thy place, and he shall steal honestly^ 
and shall bring the full half of all the plunder into the 
temple of the Dragon. 

"VII. Now while all these things passed before my 
vision a great and sudden trembling seized my whole 
frame, and I was stricken with much sorrow ; for I saw 
that, according to the Prophet Jeremiah, God will one 
day " be avenged on such a nation as this," and that 
the whole people will be made to suffer for the abomi- 
nations of Abraham the king and all the besotted wor 
shippers in the temple of the Dragon. 



32 

YIII. And in the midst of this affliction, even the 
sorrow that straineth the reins, and maketh the head 
like waters, the Angel of Peace opened the book of the 
Prophet Jeremiah, at the eleventh verse of the seven- 
teenth chapter, and commanded me to read. 

IX. Behold the words of the Prophet : "Asa par- 
tridge sitteth on eggs and hatcheth them not, so he 
that getteth riches, and not by right, shall leave them 
in the midst of his days, and at his end shall be a 
fool." 

X. And I was sore afraid, for I knew not the mean- 
ing of these words, neither could I. understand them ; 
and I spake unto the Angel of Peace, and said : I pray 
thee to open mine eyes that I may know and under- 
stand the words of the Prophet. 

XI. Then the Angel opened his mouth and taught 
me, saying : The days shall come when the land shall 
be full of green paper, and it shall be called money by 
the worshippers of the black Idol. And every man 
shall have a bag full of such as is called money ; yea, 
the woolly-headed Dragon shall measure out his money 
to the followers of the king by the hundred yards at a 
measure;- and they that are drunken and such as 
spend their days with lewd women, and such as know 
not how to read, neither can they write, by reason of 
their great ignorance, shall abound with money as a 
dog with fleas, yea, as a little dog with many fleas. 

XII. And verily I say unto you that the people, 
whose eyes shall be charmed so that they shall think 
the green paper to be money, shall allow the king's 
purse-bearer, even he that shall be called Chase, be- 
cause the imaginations of his heart shall be chased day 
and night by visions of the fair daughters of Ethiopia, 
to heap up a great mountain of debt, so that the people 
can never climb to the top thereof, neither can they 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 33 

dig under it, nor go round it, but it shall be there to 
devour the substance of them and their children for- 
ever and ever. 

XIII. Behold, he that thinketh himself rich, by rea- 
son of so much green paper, shall be poor, for the day 
cometh that it shall be naught, and, as saith the Pro- 
phet Jeremiah, " at his end he shall be a fool." 

XIV. Then barken unto me, O ye fools ! for the day 
cometh that shall bum as an oven, and all ye that have 
made gain by shoddy, and enriched yourselves by the 
robbing of the people, shall be burned up by the tierce 
anger of the people ; for I say unto you that hunger 
breaheth through a stone vail, and that the wealth 
which you shall steal away from the people, as the un- 
lawful spoils of war, shall be scattered by the hand of 
the people, to them and to their children, and your 
own offspring shall beg bread in the street. 



CHAPTER VII. 

1 The Angel of Peace pronounceth tlie doom of the worshippers of 
the Hack Idol. 2 Their sons shall le sent forth to buttle and 
die. 3 The warriors of Sunlund shall hill them man for man. 
4 The Angel of Peace showeth that the woolly-headed Dragon 
had made his worshippers like swine, and not like men. 5 Their 
names shall stink in the nostrils of the nations. 6 Ee foretell- 
eth the doom of the Loyal Leaguers. 

I. Tires saith the Angel of Peace : O ye followers 
of the woolly-headed Dragon, who hath hardened your 
hearts that ye cannot feel, who hath blinded your eyes 
that ye cannot see! For have you not said one to 
another : Let us gather together our sons, even under 
2* 



34 PEOPHECIES OF STEPHEN, 

the banners of our fighting men, and send them down 
to the dwellers in Sunland, to slay all that will not 
bow the knee to the comely black Idol in the temple 
of the Dragon ! 

II. And behold your sons shall go forth and they 
shall not return. They shall take the sword and they 
shall perish by the sword. The mothers of the land 
shall weep for the slain of their offspring ; your old 
men shall die, waiting for the return of their youngest 
born, and there shall be no eye that shall not weep, 
no, not from one end of the land to the other. 

III. Now, therefore, barken unto me, and giye ear 
to the words of my saying ! To what end do you send 
forth your sons to kill the dwellers in Sunland ! For 
do they not slay your sons, man for man ? To what 
end do you burn their wheat-fields ? To what end do 
you steal their cunningly- wrought silyer spoons ? To 
what end do you lie down in the tall grass by the side 
of their black wenches ? For is it thus that you would 
bring them back to sit with us in love as did their 
fathers? 

IY. O ye blind of heart and void of understanding, 
who hath delivered you over into this slough of fool- 
ishness? Who hath made you like swine, and not 
men? Who hath taught you to forget that you are 
white men, and not negroes ? Yerily I say unto you 
that you have debased yourselves, and gone after other 
gods, wallowing about in blood and nncleanness. 

Y. Therefore, saith the Angel of Peace, ye shall 
perish in your naughtiness. Ye shall be a by-word 
among the nations ; yea, and your names shall stink 
in the nostrils of the nations ; so that there shall be 
none that do not abhor you. They shall point at you 
in the streets, and shall say : There goeth a fool ; yea, 
a very fool, and the father of fools ! 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 35 

VI. And ye of the "Loyal Leagues" shall be in- 
flated with ignorance and pride, and shall' swell up 
until ye crack with insolence and much stuffing, so 
that they of clean lives shall run from you, and hold 
their noses at your passing. Verily I say unto you 
that this shall be your reward in the world that now 
is ; and in that which is to come ye shall be with the 
Ethiopians. 



CHAPTER Till. 

I Abraham gettetli in trouble with his officers of custom. 2 His 
servant Barney. 3 The Tribunes defend him. 6 General Ray- 
mond of Solferino, organizeth a corps of liars. 10 The wick- 
edness of the Times. 12 The great General Bust Steed comcth 
out of the Tombs. 13 Day Vis the Traitor. 14 Bust Steed 
draweth a Curt in before him. IS The greet General Cock- 
Ran. 20 Lix, icho hath an itch for office. 21 Daniel the Sic- 
kle. 27 RufuS) the Ling's merry-Andrews. 

I. And Abraham the king shall grow in trouble day 
by day ; for they that serve him shall be of a corrupt 
heart, insomuch that they shall rob the strong box of 
the king, and bring his name into great contempt among 
the people. Even his servant Barney shall gather about 
him, at the receipt of custom, such as traffic with the 
heathen for their own gain, even Stanton, who is the 
weak male member of the body of that strong woman, 
who is the mother of the Bloomers. 

II. And they shall make the place of the receipt of 
customs a den of thieves, so that the merchant men 
shall murmur among themselves, and shall say unto 
the king, We pray thee to deliver us from the extor- 
tions of thy servant Barney. 



36 PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN, 

III. Now the king shall have Tribunes in the city 
of Gotham, at the place of the receipt of customs, 
which shall rule over the people in his stead ; and he 
shall say to his Tribunes, Now judge me of this mat- 
ter of my servant Barney, whether he lacketh any- 
thing, or hath too much of his own cunning to be use- 
ful unto us. 

IV. And the Tribunes shall say unto the king, Thy 
servant Barney is a faithful and just serving-man, 
inasmuch as he loveth the black Idol, and turneth out 
of the place of custom all whose grandfathers, yea, 
whose great-grandfathers were worshippers of the white 
deities. 

Y. Then the king shall say, Lo, Barney is a good 
boy. 

YI. Now Abraham shall be sorely vexed because 
of the want of great generals in the land. And he 
shall send out to the far land of Italy, and command 
to come unto him the mightiest commander of the 
world, even General Raymond, the immortal hero of 
the bloody field of Solferino, and he shall say unto 
him, I pray thee to organize for me the second great 
army corps of my kingdom, even an army of liars, 
that we may meet and overcome the worshippers of 
the white deities, who think to put us down with the 

TRUTH. 

YIL And this mighty general, even Raymond of 
Solferino, shall hasten unto the king to prostrate him- 
self before the throne ; and he shall stand up before 
the king, in stature a mighty giant, full sixty inches in 
height. 

YIII. And he shall speak to the king, saying, 
Mighty monarch of the universe ! brother to the sun, 
and first cousin to the moon ! behold, both the world 
and I applaud thy wisdom and thy patriotism, in 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 37 

meeting the foolish hosts of truth with the proud and 
the resistless army of lies. Thou shalt sec how I will 
scatter them to the four winds of heaven ; yea, they 
shall be as dust under the wheels of my chariot, so 
that he that thinketh he standeth by reason of the 
truth, shall he trodden under foot of the legion of 
liars that I, even Eaymond of Solferino, shall lead 
against him. 

IX. And the king shall embrace his liar, even 
the terrible Raymond, and shall commission him to 
go forth at once, and smite the armies of truth hip 
and thigh, so that no man shall dare to tell the truth 
any more, lest he be thrown into prison, or have his 
bones broken upon a wheel. 

X. Behold, these shall be Times that try men's 
souls ! 

XI. And Abraham shall appoint him a marshal in 
Gotham, one Murray, the grammarian, not the son 
nor the pupil of Lind ley ; and he shall have a nose 
like a hound, that smelleth afar the disciples of truth 
and all such as worship in the temple of the wdiite 
deities. But he shall be a man without malice, which 
only executeth the will of the king. 

XII. In those clays a mighty general shall come up 
out of the Tombs in Gotham, even the great and the 
invincible Richard the last, called Bust Steed, who is 
so named because he uitrsteth away from the ladies' 
chambers, and rusheth like an unthinking steed into 
battle. 

XIII. Him shall the king send forth to meet the 
armies of Day Vis, the Cyclops, who shall be so 
called because, as his name signifieth, he shall be op- 
posed to the light, and shall seek to delude the minds 
of his people with sin, even with the darkness and de- 
lusion of treason. 



38 PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN, 

XIY. But, lo, when this great general, even Bust 
Steed, shall come into the land of the heathen, the 
dismayed soldiers of Day Vis, the cyclops, shall run 
before him as hares flee before a tit-mouse, and shall 
not stop until they have run a hundred thousand miles 
beyond the gates of their own city, even Rich Mond, 
which is so named in derision, because of the great 
poverty of the place. 

XY. Behold, when the other generals of the king 
shall see these things, they shall wax jealous of Richard 
the last, surnamed Bust Steed, and shall persuade the 
king to send him back to Gotham. 

XYI. And .Richard the last, when lie arriveth in 
Gotham, shall subside ; and he shall seek to hide him- 
self behind a Curt in, which cometh from the executive 
chamber of the land of Penn, but which he findeth at a 
tavern, where the Curtin is wont to be. And this 
shall be the last of Richard. 

XYII. But the feast which Richard the last giveth 
in honor of the highly illuminated executive Curtin, 
of the land Penn, shall be remembered many days, 
because of the great and mighty men that shall be 
there. 

XYIII. For unto the feast shall come John, called 
the General, whose name shall also be Cock-ran, be- 
cause he goeth into battle like a fighting cock, and 
runneth out again like a chicken, that hicleth itself 
under its mother's wing when it heareth the cry of the 
hawk. 

XIX. But by reason of these valorous deeds, the 
worshippers of the Dragon in the land of See More 
shall make him chief officer of the law, because they 
shall imagine in their hearts that he who faileth as a 
general in battle, will make the braver general in 
peace ; and though he knoweth not the law, they shall 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 39 

take him on their shoulders, and cany him up into the 
temple of justice, and set him in the chief seat before 
the judges. 

XX. And, lo, there cometh among the guests, at the 
feast of Richard the last, that other John, whose sur- 
name is Dix, who shall become a great general in the 
armies of the king, not, withal, because he belie veth 
in the worship of the Dragon, but because he hath an 
itch for office, and is wont to run his head into every 
open place where he hopeth to find one. 

XXI. Xow in those days shall appear Daniel, called 
the Sickle, because he killeth a man ; and he shall be 
of such evil report among men, that he seeketh the 
battle held that he may die, and be at rest, where he 
hideth hi§ sins in the grave. 

XXII. But, lo, when he cometh to the battle field, 
he shall fight bravely, even standing his ground against 
the hosts of the heathen until he loseth a leg; and he 
shall not give up until he falleth from his horse by 
reason of the loss of much blood. 

XXIII. Now when this Daniel returneth to his own 
city of Gotham, he shall be of great repute among the 
worshippers of the black Idol, insomuch that notwith- 
standing aforetime he was hated by the Woolly-heads, 
they shall think to put him into the chief seat in 
Gotham. 

XXIY. By reason of this, great contention shall 
spring up among the Woolly-heads, and such as worship 
the black Idol in Gotham; and they shall w r rangle 
among themselves, some saying, What ! will you put 
this man into the chief seat, who aforetime was offensive 
unto us, so that no man trusteth him ? Other some 
shall say, Hath the cunning vices of the Sickle's head 
also been lopped oif by the losing of a leg ? 

XXV. But the king's Tribunes shall come into the 



40 

assembly of the Woolly-heads, and shall command them 
to cease wrangling one with another, saying, What 
mattereth it who sitteth in the chief seat in Gotham, if 
he be a man withal which is void of conscience, so 
that he shall not stand up for the law, but willingly 
doeth the will of the king ? 

XXYI. And there shall be silence in the assembly 
of the Woolly-heads. 

XXVII. But, lo, Eufiis, the king's merry- Andrews, 
even the surveyor, shall stand up, as he is wont to do, 
and blow his own horn, until the people shall run out 
of the assembly and scatter themselves to their own 
homes. 



CHAPTEK IX. 

3 Stephen rebuketh those who cry war in hie name. 4 He denounc- 
ed the Forney-cater. 5 He exposeth Martin, the son of By er. 
6 And Jacob, the Apostate, surnamed Van Etta. 7 He showeth 
how they deceive the people in his name. 9 He prophesicth their 
destruction. 14 The people shall break the black Idol in pieces. 

I. And I, Stephen, saw that there shall be great 
tribulation as long as the woolly- headed Dragon liveth. 
And many are they that shall fall away from the truth, 
and shall speak all manner of lies, and do many un- 
clean things in my name, even in the name of Stephen, 
the son of Douglas. 

II. Behold, such shall go out into the highways, 
blowing the trumpet of war in my name. And they 
shall say that We are the followers of Stephen, the sou 
of Dongias, because we are for war ; but, verily I say 
unto you, that all such shall know that they are de- 
ceivers, for there is no truth in them ; and they bias- 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 4:1 

pkeme, and in my name seek the destruction of the 
land. 

III. For did not I say unto the people in the temple 
of the nation, that " War is disunion — war is final, 
eternal separation?" Did not I proclaim it aloud 
that, " Peace is the only policy that can save the conn 
try ?" Did not I teach that, " Only those are for wai 
who want disunion ?" Who, then, are these . false 
teachers that shall go about in my name fanning the 
red flame of war ? Verily I say unto you, they are de- 
ceivers, and the sons of darkness, neither is there any 
truth in them, 

IV. And of these deceivers shall be one that sat 
with me, and break bread at my own table. By reason 
of his love of filthy lucre he shall s,ell himself to the king, 
to be a chief worshipper of the black Idol in the temple 
of the Dragon. And he shall become fond of strong 
drink, and shall be given to gluttinous living, and be 
known in the whole region round about as one that 
catereth to the appetites of his own belly, insomuch 
that he shall be called Forney-cater ; and shall also be 
called the dog, by reason of his much barkiug for the 
king. 

Y. So also shall that Martin, the son of Ryer, who 
was aforetime a great judge in the kingdom of Jersey, 
go out falsely teaching war in my name. Him shall 
Jack the giant-killer slay, so that there shall be heard 
no more of him, neither of him nor his lies, forever. 

YI. And Jacob, the Apostate, also of the kingdom of 
Jersey, the descendant of the mighty King Gambrenus, 
the inventor of lager beer, who is surnamed Van Etta, 
shall bring much scandal upon me by reason of his war 
howling in my name. Him shall William, called the 
Wright man, by reason of his truth, slay in the Assem 
bly chamber of the kingdom of Jersey ; and Daniel, 



42 PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN, 

the Senator, who shall be called .Wholes-man, be- 
cause he is whole and hath an undivided heart for 
peace, shall bury the apostate, lace downward, with 
his nose resting upon the first edition of the Helper 
Book, because in his lifetime he was a disciple of 
Helper, and a secret follower of the Dragon. 

VII. Now, all that go out to deceive the people and 
teach war in my name shall come to an untimely end, 
and perish in the midst of their days ; for did I not 
stand up in the temple and declare, iii the presence of 
the traitors who urged the king to go to war, that 
" There, is no laio thai authorizes it. To do the act, or 
attempt it s would he one of those high crimes and usur- 
pations that woidd justly subject the President of the 
United States to impeachment" 

VIII. For I say unto you, as was taught aforetime 
by the founders of the Republic, even by the mighty 
men who framed the Constitution and the Union, and 
hath been taught by the Democracy from the begin- 
ning, that, " The coercive power of the Federal Gov- 
ernment, as applied to States, is the coercion of law 
and not of arms." Behold, these are the words of the 
wise father, speaking in the convention of the States, 
even the convention that made the Constitution. 

IX. Come, now, hearken unto me ; for who is he 
that seeth not that, if the chief Government can, 
of its own motion, collect an army and send it forth 
against the governments of the States, then our fathers 
were void of wisdom, nay, they were very fools ; for they 
thought to form a government of coequal and sovereign 
States, when, behold, they made a despotism, even a 
military despotism, which hath power at any time "to 
deluge the land with blood, and bring to an end the 
glorious principle of self-government which our fathers 
died to establish in this land. 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 43 

X. Verily I say unto you, that the day cometh 
that shall bring these men into judgment ; for the peo- 
ple shall follow after them in the streets, and shall de- 

1 of them, saying, Where is the Union that was 
builded by our fathers? 

XI. And the chief worshippers of the Dragon, even 
they that aforetime called the Constitution a " lie and 
a cheat," shall answer them, saying, "The covenant 
with death " is broken, so that ye can no more have 
the Union unto yourselves, neither yon nor your chil- 
dren, forever. 

XII. Behold, when the people shall understand these 
things, they shall gather themselves together in the 
market-places, and at the corners of the streets, and, 
with a loud voice, shall demand of the followers of the 
king, Give us back the Union that our fathers gave us ! 

XIII. And the chief rulers shall sneer in their 
thoughts, and secretly rejoice in their hearts ; for they 
shall think that, by reason of the war, they have sun- 
dered the Union, and put an end to the Constitution 
forever and ever. 

XIY. But the people shall grow more and more 
violent, day by day, insomuch that there shall be 
great commotion throughout the land, such as never 
was before in these borders ; and they shall rush into 
the temple of the Dragon and break the black Idol in 
pieces ; and the worshippers of the Idol shall flee be- 
fore the mighty anger of the people, so that they shall 
be in fear for their lives, and shall run to and fro, like 
foxes before the hunter. 



44 PKOPHECIES OF STEPHEN 

CHAPTER X. 
Copperhead, Black-snake, and Rattlesnake Indians, 

I. And it shall come to pass in those days that the 
spirit of war shall spread abroad throughout the land, 
so that every part of it shall be at enmity one with 
another. 

II. Yea, even the Indian tribes that aforetime were 
at peace with one another, and with all the world, shall 
be at strife by reason of the wickedness and violence of 
the worshippers of the Dragon. 

III. Lo, the Copperhead Indians are brave and gen- 
erous beyond all other tribes in the land, and seek 
peace above all things, both with such as dwell in their 
own land, and such as come from afar. 

IV. But the Black-snake Indians are of a differ- 
ent tribe ; full of all subtlety, yea, of maliciousness, 
bigotry, revenge, and all uncleanness, insomuch that 
they can be at peace with no nation, no, not even with 
themselves. 

V. And they shall assemble in their secret places, 
even in their caves, that shall be called Y/ide- Awakes, 
because in them the evil eye never sleepeth ; and they 
shall plot among themselves how they shall get hold 
of the government, so that they may oppress the Cop- 
perheads, and destroy the altars that they love, even 
the altars of the white deities that were builded afore- 
time by their fathers. 

YI. Lo, they shall speak in the secret places to one 
another, saying, the Copperheads are a proud and stiff- 
necked people, which will never come down to worship 
the black Idol of our tribe, by reason of the pride of 
their own birth, and the caste of race, which growetl: 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 45 

among them day by day, insomuch that they despise 
even to enter the temple of the comely black Idol. 

VII. Now, therefore, let us make war upon the 
Rattlesnake tribe that inhabit the region that lietli to 
the south, which is full of riches, and easily tempteth 
the eye of the stranger, and such as are fond of gain, 
even of the plunder that cometh of war. 

TILL And, behold, we will cunningly say to the 
young men of the Copperheads, who are brave and full 
of a martial spirit withal, "We pray ye to go down with 
us and help us against the Rattlesnakes, which threaten 
to descend with fire and sword upon all the tribes of 
the North, even upon the Black-snakes and upon the 
Copperheads, which seek to be at peace with all the 
world. 

IX. And, lo, when the young men of the Copper- 
heads shall go down against the Rattlesnakes, we will 
stay behind, even at home, and make ourselves agree- 
able, if happily we may, to their wives and fair 
daughters, even to them whose husbands and brothers 
we have sent off to fight our battles against the tribes 
of the South. 

X. Moreover, when all the young men of the Cop- 
perheads are away in battle, then will we fall upon 
their fathers and brothers that shall remain behind, 
and scourge them, so that they shall not have any 
peace who refuse to go with us into the temple of the 
Dragon and worship the black Idol. 

XX And they shall sigh for the Union that their 
fathers made with all the tribes in this land ; but' we 
will mock at their desires, yea, we will laugh at their 
expectations ; and when they shall say, let us have the 
Constitution as it hath been from the beginning, we 
will smite them, they and the altars of their white 
deities, so that none shall dare to oppose the new gov- 



46 PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN, 

ernment that the Blade- snakes shall establish in the 
land. 



CHAPTEE XL 

Great battle between tlie Snake tribes. 

I. Behold, I, Stephen, son of Douglas, saw in my 
vision the imaginations of the thoughts of the Black- 
snakes^ that they were evil continually, and that they 
will do even as they plotted in the war-councils, in the 
secret caves of the tribe. 

II. And it shall come to pass that the Copperhead 
tribe shall fall into the trap that shall be set for them 
by the Black-snake Indians ; and their young men 
shall go out to battle against the Baitlesnakes, even as 
it was plotted, so that the Black-snakes shall be left 
masters of the situation at home, even of the ballot- 
boxes, and of the altars of the white deities. 

III. But the cunning chiefs of the Copperheads shall 
they bribe with emeralds, and with high posts of honor, 
both in the temple of the Dragon and the army that 
moveth against the tribes of the South. 

IV. So that these, even the Copperhead chiefs, which 
shall sell themselves for emeralds or office, shall be the 
most daring and devilish of all the conspirators in the 
temple of the Dragon ; yea, they shall be put foremost 
by the chiefs of the Black-snakes, to smite the altars 
of the white deities wherever they shall find them, and 
to bring to an end both the Constitution and laws that 
have been in this land from the beginning. 

Y. But it shall come to pass that the widows and 
orphans of the Copperheads that shall be slain in the 
battles of the Black-snakes, shall be an exceeding great 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 47 

throng, so that they shall block up the streets, and 
hinder men and women from passing to and fro freely 
to the churches and market-places. 

VI. And these, even the widows and orphans, shall 
cry aloud in the streets, and shall demand of the rulers 
of the Black-snakes, and of the apostate chiefs of the 
Copperheads, Where are onr husbands? where are our 
fathers ? 

VII. But the rulers of the Black-snalces and the 
apostate chiefs of the Copperheads shall answer them 



nothing. 



VIII. And the flood of death, even the tide of blood, 
shall roll on until it hath covered the whole land, so 
that the angel of destruction shall sit at every man's 
door, and the bloody banner of the Black-snakes shall 
wave over the fallen altars of the«white deities in the 
temple of liberty. 

IX. And it shall come to pass that when the old 
men, and the virtuous youths, of the Copperheads shall 
see these things they shall begin to murmur among 
themselves, saying, To what end is this sea of bloodl 
and who hath bewitched our people that they join the 
Black-snakes against their own race ? 

X. Then the rulers of the Black-snakes shall seize 
upon all such, and thrust them into prison to be de- 
voured of the woolly-headed Dragon. 

XI. Verily, I say unto yon, that all this shall only 
make matters the worse for the Black-snakes and their 
Idol ; for the Copperheads, though they be a peaceful 
tribe, shall be wrought in the extreme by reason of 
these oppressions, and they shall begin to say one to 
another, j^ow, why have we permitted these things ? 

XII. For is not this the land of our fathers ? and 
this temple of liberty, was it not builded by their 
hands \ and these altars of the white deities, were they 
not established for us, and for onr childern forever? " 



48 PROPHECIES OF STEPHEN. 

XIII. JS"ow, therefore, why do we permit all these 
things to be destroyed under the cheat of making war 
upon the Rattlesnakes of Sunland ? 

XIV. For doth it come to pass that we cannot fight 
the Rattlesnakes afar in Sunland, without heating our 
own altars to pieces at home ? Must we give up our 
own liberty and become the slaves of the Black-snakes, 
for the sake of depriving the Rattlesnake tribe of their 
freedom ? 

XV. And, behold, when the Black-snakes shall hear 
and understand these murmurings among the Copper- 
heads, they shall wriggle, and squirm, and hiss, and 
begin to put themselves in the attitude to spring upon 
the Copperheads, and shall threaten to strangle them. 

XVI. Now the Copperheads are armed with a deadly 
weapon, so that whqn their enemies, even the Black- 
snakes, shall fall upon them, they will meet with swift 
destruction. 

XYII. And the battle when it cometh shall be 
short, and the end of the Black-snakes shall be as sud- 
den as the lightning falleth out of the clouds. 

XVIII. For the whole tribe of the Copperheads are 
warriors ; and when their enemies shall fall upon 
them, who have, withal, few brave warriors of their 
tribe, they shall drive them like chaff before a mighty 
rushing wind, yea, and they shall be scattered as 
chaff to the four winds of heaven. 

2£lX. And I, Stephen, Son of Douglas, see that the 
end of these things shall be that the Black-snakes shall 
be driven into their holes, and their Idol in the temple 
Df the Dragon shall be broken in pieces, so that the 
white deities, whose altars are in the temple of liberty, 
shall abide in this land forever and ever. 

END OF BOOK FIRST. 




( 38 . ' 



BOOK 



OF THB 



PROPHET STEPHEN, 



SON OF DOUGLAS. 



book: sboofd 



NEW YORK: 

J. F. FEEKS, PUBLISHER & BOOKSELLER, 
No, 26 ANN STREET, 



Entsrbd according to Act of Congress, in the year 1S64, by 

J. F. FEEKS, 

la the Clerk's Office of the District Ciurt of the United States, for the Southern 

District of New- York. 



li £•& 



STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 



boob: second 



CHAPTEE I. 

1 The Prophet sheweth that War shall destroy the Land, 
4 The King's conscience an Iron- Clad Monitor. 1 1 The 
King haveth a Dream. 12 Seward drinketh Prophesying 
whisky. 15 The Devil delighted at his success with Abra- 
ham. 

I. Behold, O my people ! war shall continue in the 
land, and shall desolate it ; yea, it shall destroy it, so 
that they that knew it and loyed it, shall flee from it 
and know it no more. 

II. But a remnant shall be left, even the Democ- 
racy which descended from the mighty Chiefs of the 
Kevolution, who aforetime had fashioned the laws, 
and made the name of their country to be feared to 
the uttermost ends of the earth. 

III. But these shall suffer great tribulation by rea- 
son of the violence of the followers of the Woolly- 
Headed Dragon ; and shall be reviled, and cast into; 
prison ; for the King of the Woolly-Heads shall reign* 
for the space of a thousand and four hundred days ; 
and all the days of his rule shall be counted as a 
scourge upon the people for their sins. 

IY. For behold the King's conscience, even his in- 



% STEPHEN THE PBOPHET. . 

ward monitor, shall be an Iron Clad, so that it shall be 
impenetrable, and shall be proof against the clamors 
of those who love the constitution which the King had 
taken an oath to support, but which the worshipers of 
the black Idol shall swear he shall not keep, for they 
will have him to trample it under his feet. 

Y. And the wrath of Abraham the King shall be 
kindled against the people because they love the Con- 
stitution and the laws of their Fathers. 

VI. And he shall call unto him his purse-bearer, 
who is called Salmon because he is seedy, even as a 
fish, and shall command him saying, do thou council 
with the chief rulers in the temple of the Dragon, how 
we can worry and punish the people because they 
will not worship the comely black Idol. 

VII. And they said one with another, Behold we 
will fill the land full of Greenback Locusts which shall 
devour the substance of the people, and shall cause 
every little thing to be of an exceeding great price, 
so that none but such as we will feed from the temple 
of the Dragon shall have the wherewithal of life. 

VIII. All these things shall delight the king, so 
that he shall embrace his scaly purse-bearer, even he 
that is called Salmon ; and the worshipers of the 
black Idol shall smite themselves for joy, because of 
the suffering of the worshipers of the White deities. 

IX. Lo, in the midst of these revelries a sound 
shall be heard from afar, coming up from the North, 
and from the East, and from the West, like the noise 
of many waters, and Abraham, the King, shall be 
seized with wonder and fear, and shall send forth his 
faithful trumpeters to search out the cause of so great 
a commotion. 



BOOK SECOND. 5 

X. And they shall return quickly to tell the King 
how the worshipers of the White deities are gathering 
in the mountains and in the vallies, like the leayes of 
the forest, crying aloud that the altars buildecl by 
their fathers shall remain for them and for their 
children forever and ever ! j 

Lo, these things shall trouble the heart of the King, 
so that his countenance shall change, and his looks 
shall become like unto that of a buzzard that is sick. 
The hair of his flesh shall stand on end. His meats 
and his drinks shall not nourish him ; even his jokes 
shall become dry and husky. 

XI. But when the eventide cometh " the govern- 
ment" shall sleep, and in a dream the devil shall 
appear unto him, even the King, saying — "The 
Constitution is not equal to the exigencies of the 
case ;" " the dogmas of the quiet past are not suffi- 
cient for the stormy present ;" "the situation is piled 
high with difficulties, and therefore we must rise with 
the occasion." 

XII. Now when the morning cometh, the King 
shall summon his faithful Fuglemen, even him that is 
called Sumner, the same being the descendant of a 
comely black wench from the land of Demerara ; and 
Seward, the prophet, who drinketh much Prophesying 
Whiskey, and foretelleth the times and the seasons 
when war shall end, and when the " irrepressible con- 
flict " shall bring peace, even the peace that blesseth 
the dead after the battle ; and Stanton, not he that 
fingereth the King's money in the House of Customs; 
but that other Stanton, who was aforetime a Demo- 
crat, and selleth himself to serve in the temple of the 
Dragon. 



6 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

XIII. All these and other some shall the mighty 
King of the Woolly Heads summon into his presence 
and shall open his mouth and speak unto them say- 
ing: 

XIV. O ye my Fuglemen, hearken unto me, and 
give ear to the wonderful things which the Lord hath 
done, for yester-night, at about the second hour of 
my slumber, the angel of the Lord appeared unto me 
in a dream, and shewed me the things that appertain 
to a wise and just reign over my people. 

XV. And Abraham shall tell his faithful Fuglemen 
the dream, and all the words which the devil speaketh 
unto him in the vision, and the fuglemen shall look 
one in the face of another, and shall marvel among 
themselves, saying, it is surely the Lord's doings. 

XVI. Now the devil is cunning above all things, 
and vain withal, so that when he perceiveth that the 
King taketh him for the angel of the Lord, he shall 
take delight in his own heart, and shall say unto him- 
self, Behold this King of the Woolly-Heads is the 
covey for me, and I will make him my servant, and 
he shall help me in the work of my hands. 



CHAPTER II. 

1 The King falleth into a deep Slumber. 4 The Devil tip- 
peth himself a Wink, and teacheth the King. 4 He slww- 
eth that the way to Save the Union is to Destroy it. 
23 The Devil leaveth a blue streak behind him, which 
s?nelleth like the Itch. 

I. And behold when darkness covers the earth, and 



BOOK SECOND. 



night cometh on, a deep slumber shall fall upon the 
eyes of Abraham the King. 

II. And when the devil seeth him asleep he taketh 
the form of the comely black Idol, and goeth in unto 

<; him, and saith unto him in a loud voice, but soft 
withal as Ethiopic music, — Abraham! Abraham I 
Abraham ! 

III. Behold the King turneth in his sleep, and an- 
swereth the devil with reverent speech, " What, my 
dear lord?" 

IV. The devil tippeth a wink to himself, and saith, 
I pray thee, O King, listen to the words of wisdom 
that cometh from thy fathers, and hearken unto the 
truth that the Lord sendeth to thee. 

V. For verily I say unto you, that the way to save 
the Union is to destroy it. If thou wouldst have it 
flourish like a green bay tree pluck up its roots, for 
the roots are heavy, holding much earth, which drag- 
geth its top downwards and stoppeth its growth. 

VI. Moreover, O King, thou knowest that all men 
are born equal, especially them that be of African de- 
scent. 

VII. Hold this truth to be self-evident, That, in or- 
der to preserve a Kepublican form of Government, all 
power must be derived from them that govern, and 
not, as the wicked teach, from the consent of the gov- 
erned. 

VIII. Know also, that the Union made the States ; 
and not the States the Union, as is held by them that 
are wicked. j 

IX. A people that would be free, must be governed, 
not by the law, but by military necessity, which being 
interpreted, signifieth the will of the King, and not 
the consent of the people, as say the wicked. 



8 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

X. The people have no part nor lot in government, 
but to submit to the will of them that govern . 

XI. Beware ! O righteous ruler, of the ballot, for it 
is the device of the enemies of freedom ; and if thou, 
in thy weakness, destroy it not, it will hang thee. 

XII. Follow thou after the counsel of the great 
Douglas ; but be sure it be that Douglas which spell- 
eth his name with an F. 

XIII. Beware of all such as say, " The privilege of 
the Writ of Habeas Corpus shall not be suspended," 
for they are enemies of human freedom and foes of 
the government. 

XIV. The right of a people to keep and bear arms 
for self-defense is a device of the wicked, not to be 
tolerated by a righteous ruler. 

XV. He that saith that the people " shall be secure 
in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against 
unreasonable searches and seizures," is an enemy of 
the State, and should be disposed of speedily. 

XVI. Shun the councils of all such as declare that 
no searches or arrests ought to be made except on 
warrants supported by oath, and " particularly de- 
scribing the place to be searched and the person or 
tilings to be seized." 

XVII. Set thy face against them that say, " The 
trial of all crimes shall be by jury, and such trial shall 
be held in the State where the said crimes shall have 
been committed," and against them that say, "No 
person shall be held to answer for a capital, or other- 
wise infamous crime, unless on presentment or indict- 
mient of a grand jury." 

XVIII. And against those other seditious and gain- 
Baying disturbers of the peace of men who go about 



BOOK SECOND. 9 

to declare that " In all criminal prosecutions, the ac- 
cused shall enjoy the right of a speedy and public 
trial, by an impartial jury of the State and district 
wherein the crime shall have been committed, which « 
district shall have been previously ascertained by law, j 
are to be informed of the nature and cause of the ac-( 
cusation ; to be confronted with the witness against 
him ; to have compulsory process for obtaining wit- 
nesses in his favor, and to have assistance of counsel 
for his defense." 

XIX. Turn thou also a deaf ear to those sons of 
darkness who declare that, " No attainder of treason 
shall work corruption of blood, or forfeiture, except 
during the life of the person attainted." 

XX. And also to them that say, " No new state 
shall be formed or erected within the jurisdiction of 
any other state, without the consent of the legislature 
of the state so concerned." 

XXI. Pray that the wrath of heaven fall upon all 
who declare that, " No ex post facto law shall be 
passed," and who insult both God and man by affirm- 
ing the damnable sin of " freedom of speech and of 
the press." 

XXII. But above all, just and mighty ruler, turn 
thy feet out of the paths of such as declare, " the 
Constitution shall be the supreme law of the land ;" 
for thou knowest that all the damnable things herein 
named are found in that pestilent and God defying 
instrument worshiped by the Copperheads, and by 
all the followers of the White deities — called among 
them the wicked Constitution. 

XXIII. Behold when the devil shall make an end 
of breathing these things into the ear of the King, he 



10 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

shall tip himself a wink, and vanish, leaving a blue 
flame behind him, that smelleth like a country school 
house in that season when the itch prevaileth. 



CHAPTEE III 



1 The King thi?iketh the Devil's slink to be the pleasant 
odors of the comely black Idol. 2 The King calleth a 
council of his faithful Fuglemen. 5 He promiseth to 
make an end of the Constitution. 6 William the Prophet, 
speaketh. 7 Sumner the Plagiarist, speaketh. 8 Benja: 
min the Coward, speaketh Thaddeus the Crafty, speak- 
eth. 

I. Now, when the King awaketh he smelleth the 
stink of the devil, and he throweth up his eyes for 
joy, for he shall say, " Of a truth I perceive that the 
comely black Idol watcheth over my sleeping, because 
he leaveth his pleasant odors behind him." 

II. And the King, when he getteth up and washeth 
himself, calleth a council of all his Fuglemen ; yea, of 
the mighty men of the Woolly-Headed nation, and 
breaketh to them the joyful tidings of the wonderful 
things delivered to him in the vision. 

III. And he shall say unto them, Hearken unto me, 
* for the things which have been revealed shall do away 
X wit 1 1 the dead past, even with the Constitution and the 

laws, which aforetime were made by our fathers, who 
were oppressed with blindness, and all uncleanness, 
in that they denied to our dear brethren of African 
descent the equality which maketh them as one of 
ourselves. 



BOOK SECOND. H 

IY. Neither allowed they their sons to marry with 
the daughters of negroes, nor their daughters to take 
unto themselves comely black husbands, for they were 
proud and lifted up after the manner of the 
wicked. l 

V. Now, therefore, let us make an end of their 
Constitution and their statutes, even of the laws which, 
we had from the beginning, for they are an offence 
unto the saints that worship in the temple of the 
Dragon. 

VI. Whereupon William, the prophet, called Sew- 
ard by the generation of the WooDy-Heads, shall 
stand up before the King and open his mouth saying; 
it is well, O King, that we straightway make an end 
of the Constitution and the laws, for if we do not, they 
will make an end of us. 

VII. Then Sumner, the Plagiarist, he that afore- 
time had his brains knocked out in the Senate 
Chamber, because of his much lying about the in- 
habitants of Sunland, shall come forward, and stand 
close to the King, saying, To what end O King, da 
we talk of restoring the Union, when we have happily 
swept its foundations, even that instrument of blood, 
the Constitution, away forever! Verily shall we bring 
it back, to hang it up like Mahomet's coffin between 
the earth and the heavens ! 

VIII. Behold Benjamin, the Coward, surnamed 
Wade, because he had once wished that he might 
ivade up to his knees in the blood of the slaveholders* 
standeth up, saying — Why talk ye here of the Consti- f 
tution and the Union, for know ye not that they are 
dead, and their carcasses stink above the ground ? 
Now, therefore, let us, if happily we may, bury them 
and get them out of our sight. 



12 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

IX. Then Thaddeus, the Crafty, the same whose 
mother was a white woman, but whose concubine, 
even she that liveth in his own house is a free person 
of African descent, proclaimeth aloud that, as long as 
the organic laws of the States survive, the Union and 
the Constitution are daily liable to be dug up out of 
their graves ; neither is their any safety to our own 
necks as long as the governments of the States shall 
stand. 

X. And Abraham said, in due time the States shall 
be no more. 



CHAPTEE IV. 



1 The King rebukeih his Fuglemen. 5 He shoiveth that the 
people must learn by degrees to bear their new burdens. 
6 He showeth that while destroying the Union they must 
pretend to be saving it. 3 He showeth how to split rails. 
9 He shoiveth how the Democrats help him. 1 1 Hanni- 
bal the Ethiopian, trieth to speak, but cannot by reason of 
the dirt upon his face. 

I. Behold, when Abraham the King shall hear 
these murmurings and misgivings among his faithful 
Fuglemen, he shall rebuke them, saying — O ye short 
of sight and of little pluck, do ye not perceive that all 
these objects I will compass in due time. 

II. Of the old dispensation, that dates from the pro- 
slavery days of George, surnamed Washington, there 
is to be left neither the Constitution nor States, nor 
any other thing that lieth in the way of our power. 

III. But what would ye. defeat ourselves by much 



BOOK SECOND. 13 

haste ? When a man splitteth rails out of a great log 
doth he foolishly drive the wedge in at the middle ? 
No, he beginneth at one end, and by degrees worketh 
up to the centre, until at last he splitteth the log in 
twain. 

IV. Even so work we at our task, compassing the 
end by little and little until our work is done. Verily 
I say unto you, the old foundations must be taken 
away little by little, lest the people smell what is in 
the wind, and get up in their ungodly strength and 
overthrow the holy revolution which we have begun 
for the glory of the comely black Idol. 

V. Know ye not, that the people must learn by de- 
grees to bear the new burdens, which they are to 
wear evermore, lest by feeling the whole load at 
once they throw it off, and restore again the Union 
and the laws, which we have sworn by an oath to the 
Dragon, that we will destroy forever and ever. 

VI. For these reasons we must be wise as serpents, 
and pretend that we are saving the Union, while de- 
stroying it. 

VII. Did I not aforetime declare that I had no 
right and no intention to disturb the domestic institu- 
tions of the heathen in Sunland, who worship White 
deities? even so did not our own faithful Congress 
proclaim that the war should not be used for any in- 
terference with slavery, but only to enforce the laws ; 
•whereby we deceived many of the foolish worshipers 
of the White deities in the North, and gained them 
over to our own side, to help us destroy their own 
temples, even the temple of the White deities which 
were worshiped by their fathers. 

VIII. Now, therefore, be of good cheer, for in due 



14 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

time we will bring all things to pass according to the 
desires of our own hearts ; but beware that ye drive 
not on too fast, so that ye lose the support of those 
foolish but useful democrats, whom we happily use 
to fill up our armies and to scourge the Copperheads, 
who cry aloud in the market places and plot in secret 
for the Union and the laws. 

IX. Verily I say unto you that without the support 
of the Democrats, we must fail, and the temple of our 
comely black Idol would be destroyed, and the tem- 
ple of the White deities would nourish forever and 
ever. 

X. Behold, have we not the great ruler of the 
Knickerbockers, and he of the kingdom of Jersey, 
for tails to our kite ? Do we not profit by the cow- 
ardice and foolishness of their friends in our own 
Congress, who vote supplies to the powers that 
strangleth them and their doctrines ? Doth not even 
Jack, the Giant-killer, while he condemneth our own 
policy, with the same breath offer to make us still 
stronger to carry on our policy unto the end ? 

XI. Therefore, see ye not that we must use the 
blindness of these, our enemies, to compass our end ? 
The things revealed to me in the vision I will do, so 
that there shall not be left one stone upon another 
in the temple builded by our foolish ancestors, that 
shall not be thrown down. But I say unto you again, 
beware that ye spoil not all by much haste. 

XII. And when the King shall make an end of his 
sayings, Hannibal the Ethiopian, the same who is 
next to the King in the temple of the Dragon, shall 
get up and try to speak. 

XIII. But when he openeth his mouth, he shall not 



BOOK SECOND. 15 

be able to shut it again, nor to move his jaws a tittle, 
by reason of the much dirt on his face ; so that his 
eyes shall roll in their sockets, and his tongue shall 
wiggle about between his jaws without his being able 
to utter as much as one syllable. 

XIY. And when the King seeth it he shall laugh 
and say that it remindeth him of a story, which he 
telleth, the same being not decent even to be repeated. 

XV. But the fuglemen shall all confess that the 
King speaketh wisely, and that it is the better part to 
keep on, as they began, compassing their object by 
craft and lies, which shall deceive the foolish, of which 
there are many, and shall give such as can be bought 
with the green charms of the Dragon an excuse for 
their treachery to the White deities. 

XYI. So Abraham and the Woolly-Heads shall 
flourish ; and day by day the foundations of the white 
man's liberty shall crumble ; yea, the white man shall 
recede from the glory of his fathers, and the negro 
shall stand in his place as long the Woolly-Heads 
bear rule in the land. 



CHAPTEE Y. 

1 The Prophet showeth the speed of Loyal Leagues. The 
King instructeth the Leaguers how to destroy the rider of 
the Knickerbockers. 6 The King's liar killeth Seymour 
with a Resolution. 7 The Post Boy trieth to speak. 11 
Seymour blown to death by a Bellows. He is five lime\ 
killed by Resolution. 16 Anna Dickinson killeth him. 

I. And it shall come to pass that loyal leagues 



16 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

shall abound in those days, in so much that women 
shall forsake their own houses to go about after the 
young men who gather together for the purpose of 
drawing the people into the temple of the Wcolly- 
Headed Dragon. 

II. Behold these shall be sore oppressed by reason 
of the stiff-neckedness of the ruler of the Knicker- 
bockers who is called Seymour, who because he is a 
worshiper of White deities, hateth the black Idol, and 
worrieth them that follow after it continually. 

III. So they of the Loyal League shall go apart 
into a secret place to speak one with another pri- 
vately, and to see how they shall overcome the ruler 
of the Knickerbockers, and happily bring his councils 
to naught. 

IV. And they shall council with the King how they 
shall destroy the ruler of the Knickerbockers. 

V. And he shall speak unto them saying — Know 
ye not how I conquered the rebels in Sunland, and 
utterly destroyed them, by proclamation ; now even 
so may ye overwhelm and confound the ruler of the 
Knickerbockers, and make him to worship the black 
Idol, by resolving against him, even as I proclaimed 
against the inhabitants of Sunland. 

VI. Then a mighty warrior from Solferino, even 
Eaymond, that was aforetime called the King's liar, 
shall stand up and open his mouth, saying — As the 
King commandeth so be it Resolved, That the sole 
cause of the heart-sickening failures before the city 
of the heathen, which is called Charleston, is the cul- 
pable, the audacious and treasonable practice of the 
notorious, infamous, and shameless sympathiser, the 
ruler of the Knickerbockers, who is called Seymour. 



BOOK SECOND. 17 

And the whole assembly shall clap their hands for joy. 

VII. Then shall arise the King's Post-Boy, even 
Park, the son of Godwin, who aforetime blew himself 
to pieces, as is recorded in the first Chapter of the 
first Book of the Prophet Stephen. 

VIII. But the Leaguers shall murmur among them- 
selves, and refuse to hear him, because they know him 
not, as he appeareth with a clean face. But when he 
speaketh they shall know him, and they shall laugh 
among themselves, saying—" Who hath washed 
thee ?" 

IX. But nothing daunted, he shall cry with a loud 
voice — Be it Resolved, That to Horatio Seymour is 
due all and singly of the innumerable " irregulari- 
ties " and " botherations," even the defalcations, rob- 
beries, thefts, plunders, and stealings, which have be- 
fallen the Administration of Abraham the King. 

X. And when the Leaguers shall hear the King's 
Post-Boy, they shall greatly rejoice among them- 
selves, insomuch that their chief scribe, Horace — 
not the poet, but the philosopher of Ethiopia — shall 
be moved to open his mouth in wisdom, saying — Re- 
solved, That the unreasonable, the unrighteous, the 
inhuman prejudice of the people against negroes is 
solely on account of the rebel sympathies of Horatio 
Seymour. 

XL Whereupon one of the Chief Priests in the 
temple of the Dragon, who is called Bellows because 
he is given to much wind and bloweth hard at the 
worshipers of White deities, shall stand up and open 
his mouth, saying — Resolved, That the deplorable ig- 
norance of white men, which causeth them to believe 
that amalgamation would not produce a greatly im- 



18 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

proved type of humanity, is chargable upon the alarm- 
ing treason and devilish sophistry of Horatio Sey- 
mour. 

XII. And when the commotion is stilled, the son of 
Tilton, so called because he hath an itch to be ever 
on a tilt, who is mighty withall in his own conceit, 
shall rebuke the brethren, saying, of a truth I perceive 
that ye go not to the root of the whole matter, which 
I give unto you after the manner of wisdom — Re- 
solved, That the vulgar popular error which teacheth 
that the negro is a negro, and that the white man is 
a white man, and also affirmeth that black is not 
white and white not black, cometh of the ignorance, 
infidelity and treason of Horatio Seymour. 

XIII. Then ariseth John, surnamed Kennedy, who 
is also called the Just, and who is, withall, chief of 
the watchmen in the city of Gotham that is built by 
the waters of Manhattan. The same shall utter these 
words saying — Resolved, That the Woolly-Headed 
police of Gotham who are given to assisting burglars, 
cut-throats, and those that live by swindling, are 
moved thereunto by the God defying treason of 
Horatio Seymour. 

XIY. And behold a mighty warrior, even John the 
Great, surnamed Dix, who hath the skill to shun the 
deadly dangers of any battle-field, shall stand up pro- 
claiming that it is a military necessity for the people 
to be still that he may speak, saying — Resolved, That 
the damnable condition of the Park Barracks whence 
cometh contagion and death, ariseth alone from the 
subtlety and treason of Horatio Seymour. 

XV. Then shall come forth a chamberer from the 
place of Commerce, who is called Low, because t e 



BOOK SECOND. 19 

hath, nothing that is high in his nature, and the same 
shall utter these words, saying — Resolved, That the 
vicious character of the Police Commissioners, the 
high price of gold, and the worthlessness of govern- ; 
ment shinplasters, all come of the rebel sympathies 
of Horatio Seymour. f: , 

XVI. And in the end cometh forth the Goddess ' 
out of the temple of the Dragon, even Anna that was 
called Dickinson, and sayeth — Besolved, That igno- 
rance, incompetency and drunkenness among our 
generals, discontent among the conscripts, small-pox 
in Washington and weak-backs in men, all spring 
from the duplicity, treachery and treason of Horatio 
Seymour. 

XVII. Behold, after this manner shall the Loyal 
Leaguers, following the wisdom and the justice of their 
King, squelch and utterly exterminate the ruler of the 
Knickerbockers. And it shall be said by the genera- 
tions that are to come, that the ruler of the Knicker- 
bockers was resolved to death by the Fuglemen of the 
King, who killeth millions by proclamation. And the 
memory of the wisdom of the Woolly-Heads shall 
descend from generation to generation. 



20 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 



CHAPTEE VI. 

1 The worshipers of the Dragon showeth the book called the 
Bible should be destroyed by proclamation. 2 A strange 
man called Garret, not John Smith, expoundeth the laws 
of the Dragon. 16 Garret the Flighty, maketh an end 
of his sayings. 17 The King is troubled and doubteth 
which loay he shall go. 1 8 Wendel the son of Phillips, 
expoundeth andsheweih that the " Angel of the Lord " pur- 
sueth fugitive slaves ; Yea, even the bond woman Sarai. 
23 Wendel pray eth for a proclamation that the Bible may 
be destroyed, so that the people may be misled no more, 

I. And it shall come to pass in those days that a 
great throng of the worshipers of the Dragon shall go 
in before the King to persuade him to send forth an 
edict, even one of his exterminating proclamations, 
against the Bible. 

II. And a strange man, surnamed Smith, not John, 
but he that is called Garret, because of a nighty mind, 
shall stand up and proclaim these words, saying — 
mighty and sublime monarch, brother of the contra- 
band, and cousin to the moon, thy people have praised 
thy wonderful doings, in making an end Of the accursed 
slavery — protecting the Constitution of this land, and 
of the laws and statutes that stand in the way of the 
just punishment of all who, by reason of their stub- 
borness, refuse to worship our comely black Idol. 

III. But listen, O King, to the voice of thy people, 
for they would have thee to go to the root of this 
matter, so that our proud and boastful white race 
shall know in their hearts that they are inwardly ne- , 
groes, and that their white skins are a deception and 
an offense unto the Saints that dwell in the temple of 
the IdoL 



BOOK SECOND. 21 

IY. Now therefore we beseech thee to hearken unto 
us, for as long -as the Book that is called the Bible 
liveth to be a guide to the minds of men, there re- 
maineth no safety to the worshipers of the Idol, for it 
hath been a stumbling block to the weak, in that it 
endorseth the doctrines of slavery, and teacheth men > 
to be subject unto the laws that protect the damnable 
institution. 

V. Thou knowest that the Idol teacheth that 
slavery is a sin against God and a crime against man ; 
and that this is the foundation of all our doing, even 
of the war that we have made in the land. 

VI. But behold how the Bible contradict eth us, 
and would, if men trusted it, bring all our work to 
naught. 

"VII. For do we not read at the beginning, even in 
the seventh chapter of the Book of Genesis, that the 
Lord took a most notorious slaveholder, even Abra- 
ham, and the slaves that were " bought with his 
money " into covenant with himself, without so much 
as once rebuking slavery as a sin ; but otherwise, 
authorizing him to retain his slaves, even them that 
were " bought with his money/' while he took him 
into covenant with himself. 

VIII. Now Abraham was a great and wicked slave- 
holder, and he did wickedly arm (Gen. 14 : 14, 15,) 
three hundred and eighteen of his slaves to pursue 
certain Kings who had offended against him. 

IX. Know we not that this wretch, who was the 
owner of more than a thousand slaves is called in the 
Bible " the friend of God," and " the father of them 
that believe." 

X. Behold also how we are forbidden by the Bible 



22 /STEPHEN THE PKOPHET. 

(Exodus 20 : 17,) to covet a man's maid-servant or 
man-servant, nor anything that belongeth to him, or 
that is his property ! 

XI. Now, doth not this forbid us to take the ser- 
vant or slave from his master ? Yea, doth it not even 
establish the right of property in the slave, and affix 
the seal of condemnation upon every one who runneth 
off the contraband, which was " bought " with his 
master's " money." 

XII. Furthermore, doth not this book that is called 
the Bible proclaim this dreadful law as one that de- 
scended from the Most High — " Both thy bond-men 
and thy bond-maids which thou shalt have, shall be 
of the heathen that are round about you ; of them ye 
shall buy bond-men and bond-maids. Moreover, of 
the children of the strangers that do sojourn among 
you, of them shall ye buy and of their families that 
are with you, which they begat in your land, and they 
shall be your possession ; and ye shall take them as 
an inheritance for your children after you to inherit 
them for a possession. They shall be your bondmen 
forever." (Lev. 25 : 44, 46.) 

XIII. Moreover it is known unto all of us, and to 
the whole world, that all through the Bible, the slave 
is called his master's " money ;" so that all the people 
must see and believe that if this Book be true, the 
teachings that we have taught, yea, even the doc- 
trines of the Woolly-Heads are false above all things, 
and abominably wicked. 

XIV. Yea, then also are we thieves and murderers, 
for behold we have robbed our fellow-men of their 
" money," and murdered them ; even them and their 
wives and children, that he might establish the reli- 



BOOK SECOND. 23 

gion of the comely black Idol over them forever and 
ever. 

XY. Now therefore, O King, we beseech thee to 
destroy this book, even the Bible, with a proclama- 
tion, so that it shall be utterly destroyed, to the end 
that it may no more be a prop to them that will not ! 
worship in the holy temple of the Dragon. 

XVI. And when Garret the Flighty shall make an 
end of his saying, he shall sit down, and the throng 
that worship the black Idol shall make a great 
noise, even of approbation of things proclaimed by 
Garret the Flighty. 

And the King shall be greatly troubled, for he 
knoweth that the people love the Bible, and cherish 
it as a lamp to their feet ; while he also perceiveth 
that it dooms to eternal death the doctrines of his 
people, the Woolly-Heads. 

XVII. So when it is perceived that the King is 
troubled in his mind, and doubteth which way he 
shall go, the great Wendel, whose surname is Phil- 
lips, who cometh from a city of the East that hath a 
frog pond in its centre, even he who aforetime 
boasted that he had labored nineteen years to destroy 
the Union, shall get up and speak before Abraham, 
saying : 

XVIII. Now, why doth the King delay to send 

forth his proclamation against the Book, which is the 

bulwark of the doctrines of the worshipers of White 

deities ? I 

i 

XIX. For know ye not that this pestilent Book not 
only justifieth the holding of men as " money," and 
maketh them even as other property, but the first 
damnable fugitive slave law the world ever beheld is 
also found in the statutes of the Bible. 



24 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

XX. For it is recorded in the sixteenth chapter of 
Genesis that, when Hagar, the fugitive slave of Sarai, 
the wife of Abraham, was missing, the " Angel of the 
Lord" went to seek her to drag her back into slavery 
again. 

And when the " angel of the Lord " had found the 
poor slave in the wilderness he said — Hagar, Sarai's 
maid, whence earnest thou? and whither wilt thou 
go ? And she said, I flee from the face of my mistress 
Sarai. And the angel of the Lord said unto her, Ke- 
turn to thy mistress, and submit thyself under her 
hands. 

XXI. Verily, O King, how shall the temple of the 
black Idol stand, if such a book as this abideth ? Do 
not we teach that, if a slave runneth away we shall 
help him run ? Yea, and if he will not run of his own 
accord, we shall coax him to run, and if he is still ob- 
stinate we shall steal him ! 

XXII. How then shall we allow the Bible to con- 
tinue in the land, when it telleth the people that the 
Lord sent forth his angel to bring back a fugitive 
slave to her mistress ? For will not the people ask if 
it is the part of mortals to set themselves up above 
the Lord ? and shall we go to war to steal slaves, 
when the Lord sent his angel to bring them back into 
slavery ? 

XXIII. Of a truth, O King, I perceive that either 
the Bible must be false or we must be rascals ; and 
as we cannot be rascals it followeth that the Bible is . 
false. Then we pray, send forth thy proclamation 
and destroy it, so that it shall mislead the people no 
more! 



BOOK SECOND. 25 



CHAPTER VII. 

1 The King driven to his wits end. 2 Sendethfor the man 
of God, even Alonzo the Potter. 5. The King turneth 
pale ; Yea, even like unto a sick contraband. 6 Henry 
the Naughty, surnamed Beecher, prophesyeth. 11 
Henry shoiveth that the Scriptures of the Old Testament 
sayeth " thou shalt not steal." 

I. Now when the King heareth all these things he 
shall be driven to his wit's ends, for he shall see 
that if the Bible be true, then he and all his followers 
ought to be hanged in the life that now is, and 
damned in that which is to come. 

II. And in the midst of his great grief, he shall 
send for his faithful servant Alonzo, who is a Potter, 
and a bishop by trade, the same who fulminated 
against the good bishop of Vermont, and shall say 
unto him, Now, I pray thee, as thou art learned in 
the things that appertain to the Book that is called 
the Word of God, tell me whether the doctrines and 
teachings of the Old Testament are not abrogated in 
the New, for I fain would believe that slavery was 
condemned by Christ and his followers. 

III. Then Alonzo the Potter shall come before the 
King and open his mouth, saying, It must be con- 
fessed that if the New Testament be true, the teach- 
ings of the Old must be also, because they were con- 
firmed and enforced by Christ himself. 

IV. Moreover Christ was the fulfillment of the cov- 
enant which God made with his people under the old 
dispensation, so that he came not to destroy but to 
fulfill the Old. 

V. Behold when Abraham shall make this answer, 



26 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

the King shall turn pale, yea his countenance shall 
blanch like that of a sick contraband, because he shall 
perceive that the whole Bible is against him, and 
against the doctrines of the Dragon. 

VI. Then shall come forward Henry, the Naughty, 
whose surname is Beecher, who hath a church of job- 
bers and swindlers in a city that is built at the oppo- 
site side of the water from the city of Gotham. 

VII. And Henry, the Naughty shall say, Behold 
the time hath come when the truth must be told. 
The Bible is a pro-slavery book. I never take a text 
from it that my heart does not smite me in the face. 

VIII. I trust that the loyal friends here gathered 
together in the presence of our mighty King, will bear 
in their minds the propriety of not repeating in the 
ears of the ungodly beyond this solemn council of the 
faithful, the words herein spoken — in as much as the 
people of my charge, of happy confidence, pay me 
seven thousand dollars every year of grace for preach- 
ing from the Bible. 

IX. But here, beloved brethren, let truth be spoken 
though the heavens fall ; and as our good King seek- 
eth light, let it plainly be expressed that the Bible is 
a pro-slavery book. 

X. To what end do we seek to hide the truth from 
ourselves, and from the loyal worshipers of our most 
comely black Idol ? 

XI. Hath it not been shown unto you already how 
the Scriptures of the Old Testament would condemn 
us all as thieves, in that we steal what in that book is 
declared to be a man's "money," and the "inheri- 
tance of his children forever?" 

XII. Yea, brethren, doth it not convict us of murder, 



BOOK SECOND. 27 

inasmuch as we make war upon men and kill them in 
order to deprive them and their offspring of thek 
*' money " forever ? 

XIII. Harken unto me, brethren, and give ear, O 
King, for it shall be made plain unto you, that the 
New Testament is as pernicious as the Old, against 
the loyal doctrines of our most righteous party. 

XIV. Suffer me a little, while I speak what is knowr& 
to the learned everywhere, that the word translated 
servant in our English text means a slave, even one 
that is the property of another, as in the Old Testa- 
ment he is called his " money," and when it hath nofe 
f his damnable meaning, the word " hired " goeth be- 
fore it, so that it readeth " hired servant," in distinc- 
tion from one that is " bond/ 3 or as the Greek read- 
eth, douloi. 

XV. Be it known unto you, King, and be ife 
spoken with shame, that when Christ came on eartb. 
there were even more than twenty millions of slaves 
in the Eoman Empire. 

XVI. And Corinth, in Greece, called " the city of 
the Christians," was the chief slave market for the 
whole eastern side of Italy ; in so much that there 
were at one time four hundred thousand slaves im 
that city where Paul planted his church. 

XVII. Now it is known unto us that, notwithstand- 
ing the Savior taught in the midst of a country and & 
people where slavery was as common as the air and 
"the light of heaven, he never so much as hinted that; 
it was a sin, nor warned men against it as an evil. 

XVIII. Moreover, the Apostles founded Churches: 
of slave-holders, without so much as rebuking them 
for this great, yea this damnable shame. 



28 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

XIX. Bear witness, beloved, that had we been in 
the shoes of Christ and his Apostles we should not 
have been so remiss in our duty — for verily I say unto 
you that we would have sounded the alarm from 
Corinth to Brundisium, and from the rivers to the 
mountains; yea, we would have split the world in 
twain, even as we have split our country, before we 
would have suffered a slave-holder to live in peace ! 

XX. Nor is this the worst, beloved brethren, for 
the Savior in his teachings repeatedly referred to 
slavery, by using it for illustrations in the most beau- 
tiful of his parables without even so much as once 
leaving upon the minds of his hearers the least im- 
pression that it was a sin. 

XXI. Did he not profess that he came to declare 
the whole council of God, and did he not rebuke the 
whole catalogue of sin, except this one, the most 
damnable of all sins ! 

XXII. Beloved brethren how shall we read these 
words of the Savior without a burning cheek — " For 
the kingdom of heaven is like unto a man traveling 
into a far country, who calleth his servants (slaves) 
and delivered unto them his goods, and to one he 
gave five talents, to another two, and to another one, 
according to his ability, and straightway took his 
journey." 

XXIII. Behold, in these words the kingdom of 
heaven is likened unto a slave establishment. These 
slaves had no voluntary will or choice, as to the duty 
they were required to perform. It was demanded 
that they should take and improve the sum they re- 
ceived, and return it again to their master with the 
increase, and if they did not do as commanded, they 



BOOK SECOND. 29 

were severely punished. Their earnings went not to 
themselves but to their master. (See Bible.) 

XXIV. Even so, O King, does the Son of man use 
the institution of slavery, without rebuke ; for an illus- 
tration, in the nineteenth chapter of the book of Luke, 
where he describes a certain nobleman about to go 
into a distant country, who called his servants (slaves) 
and delivered unto them ten pounds, commanding 
them to occupy till he returned. And when he re- 
turned he called them to an account, and punished 
the one who had failed to obey his directions. 

XXV. Now men and brethren do we not perceive 
that, not only did the Savior not rebuke the institu- 
tion of slavery, but he used it familiarly, without 
leaving the faintest suspicion of sin upon it, to illus- 
trate the kingdom of heaven, 

XXVI. Moreover, brethren, the Apostles taught 
the slaves submission to their master, even as Timo- 
thy. (I Tim. vi : 1 — 5.)— "Let as many servants 
as are under the yoke count their own masters worthy 
of all honor, that the name of God and his doctrine 
be not blasphemed. And they that have believing 
masters, let them not despise them, because they arc 
brethren ; but rather do them service, because they 
are faithful and beloved, partakers of the benefit. 
These things teach and exhort. If any man teach 
otherwise, and consent not to wholesome words, even 
the words of our Lord Jesus Christ, and to the doc- 
trine which is according to godliness, he is proud, 
knowing nothing, but doting about questions and 
strifes of words, whereof cometh envy, strife, railings, 
evil surmisings, perverse disputings of men of corrupt 



30 STEPHEN THE PBOPHET. 

minds, and destitute of the truth, supposing that gain 
is godliness : from such withdraw thyself." 

XXVTT, Behold what the Apostle here teacheth ; 
even that if any man teach otherwise than reverence 
and submission on the part of slaves to their masters, 
lie is proud, knowing nothing, but doting about ques- 
tions and strifes of words, whereof cometh envy, strife, 
railings, evil surmisings, perverse disputings of men of 
corrupt minds and destitute of truth ;" and the Apostle 
warns the christian — "from such withdraio thyself" 

Now, therefore, King, if this Book be allowed to 
stand, how know we but that the people will say that 
this scripture is like a prophesy of us, even of the 
abolitionists who make it our boast that we teach 
those under the yoke to " despise " their masters, and 
to refuse " to do them service," yea, to run away from, 
and if need be to murder them ! 

XXVIII. Verily it maketh a man's bones ache to 
think of the character the Apostle draweth of such as 
we make our loyal boast to be ! 

XXIX. Moreover, what better than this abomina- 
ble teaching is that of the Apostle Paul to the slaves 
in Ephesus. (Eph. vi : 5.) — " Servants, be obedient 
unto them that are your masters according to the 
flesh, with fear and trembling, in singleness of your 
Jieart as unto Christ." 

XXX. Even so did Paul command the slaves that 
were among the Colossians (Col. in : 22.) saying : — 
Sl Servants, obey in all things your masters according 
to the flesh, not with eye-service as men-pleasers ; 
l3ut in singleness of heart, fearing God." 

XXXI. The same things said Paul, in his Epistle 
to Titus. (Titus, h : 9.)— " Exhort servants to be 



BOOK SECOND. 31 

obedient to their own masters, and to please them in 
all things ; not answering again ; not purloining, but 
showing all good fidelity ; that they may adorn the 
doctrine of God our Savior in all things." 
. Now brethren, the Apostle commands slaves not 
only to be obedient to their masters in all things, but 
he enjoins it upon them that they do not steal $ 
whereas we teach the slave both to steal and to* 
murder, and finally make an end of the matter by 
ourselves robbing the master of his slave. Verily,, 
how can we stand, if we destroy not this teaching of 
the Apostle ? 

XXXII. Moreover, the Apostle teacheth by impli- 
cation that such as teach the slave not to obey hig 
master do not "adorn the doctrine of God our 
Savior." What then are we, brethren, if this teaching 
be not false ? 

XXXIII. Even the same commanded the Apostle 
Peter to the slaves in Galatia, Cappadocia, Asia, and 
Bithynia. (I Peter, n: 18.)— " Servants (slaves) be 
subject to your masters with all fear ; not only to the 
good and gentle, but also to the froward. For this is 
thankworthy, if a man for conscience toward God 
endure grief, suffering wrongfully." 

XXXIV. But even further, O King, the Apostles 
do not stop with enjoining slaves to be obedient to 
their masters, for they also instruct the masters in 
their duty to their slaves, thus at once recognizing 
the lawfulness of the institution. (Eph. vi : 9.) 
u And ye masters, do the same thing unto them, for- 
bearing threatening : knowing that your master also 
is in heaven." 

XXXV. Behold the Apostle teacheth not the mas- 



32 STEPHEN THE PEOPHET. 

ter that it is his duty to emancipate his slave, but 
that he shall be kind to him, and merciful, even as he 
expects mercy of heaven, where he also hath a mas- 
ter. 

XXXVI. Brethren let us have the whole matter ; 
for the apostles not only teach the slave submission, 
but even contentment with their lot, even as Paul 
when writing to those whom he had converted in the 
great slave mart at Corinth. (Cor. vn : 20, 21.) — 
"Let every man abide in the same calling wherein he 
was called. Art thou called being a servant ? care 
not for it, but if thou mayest be made free, use it 
rather." 

XXXYII. Behold the Apostle teacheth slaves to 
a ^cept emancipation if offered by their masters, but 
tc be content with whatever lot, whichever it may be. 

A XXVIII. Even so the Apostle of the Lord Jesus 
Christ made himself the executor of the fugitive-slave 
law that was in vogue in those days. For when a 
good-for-nothing slave, named Onesimus, had run 
away from Philemon his master, he went to Rome, 
where he heard Paul preach and was converted, 

XXXIX. Behold when the Apostle knew his case 
he sent him directly back to his master ; which thing 
we should not do, for, verily, the Lord knoweth that 
we should send him on his way to Canada, or help 
him to go back stealthily to poison his master. 

XL. Know also brethren, that this slaveholder 
Philemon, had a church of believers in Christ which 
met in his own house. And the Apostle calls this 
slave-holder a " fellow beloved," and a " dearly be- 
loved brother ;" and upon the believing slave-holders 
who met for worship in Philemon's house he pro- 



BOOK SECOND. 33 

nounced the benediction — u Grace to yon and peace, 
from God onr Father and onr Lord Jesns Christ." 

XLI. Behold, brethren, snch is not the benediction 
we pronounced npon the slave-holding professors, bnt 
that other one, even the baptism of fire, sword, star- 
vation and death ! 

XLII. Verily, this false teacher, even Paul, and his 
slavery-defending epistles must be squelched, or we 
must go down to our grave with the word of infidel 
and assassin_ engraved upon our name. 

XLIII. Even so, brethren, did the Son of Man, even 
after the same fashion that his Apostles received 
slaveholders ; for when a slave-holding Centurian 
came to him, beseeching him to heal his sick servant 
(slave), the Lord immediately restored his slave, and 
turning to his disciples, said : " Yerily I say unto you, 
I have not found so great faith, no, not in Israel," 
(Matt, vm : 10.) 

XLIY. Now, brethren, is this the way to treat 
slaveholders? O mighty King, thy true and loyal 
subjects beseech thee to hear us, and destroy, even 
with thy fierce proclamation this Book, even the Bible, 
which is the bulwark of slavery, and a stumbling block 
to the feet of many. And when Henry Ward the 
Naughty had said these things, he subsided, remind- 
ing the brethren that his speech was entirely confi- 
dential. 

XLV. So when Henry the Naughty shall subside^ 
a great man among the Woolly-Heads, even he that 
is called Garrison, because he hath set himself for a 
defense of the temple of the Dragon, shall come for- 
ward before the King and rejoice with a loud voice, 
saying: 



34 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

XLVT. Now is the day of my triumph ! for did I 
mot declare, even twenty years ago, that tlie only hope 
of the slave was over the grave of the American Church ? 
3S"ow then, O mighty King, make the Bible to follow 
the Constitution, that they may both rot together in 
the same grave ! 

XL VII. And the grand Council of Loyal Leaguers 
shall rejoice with joy unspeakable at these things. 



OHAPTEB VIII. 



2 Abraham promiseth to issue a proclamation against the 
Bible. 4 He telleth a story of a man whose sons killeth 
■Skunks, 10 He showeth that the Bible hath no effect ivith 
the Woolly Heads. 13 He showeth that the Bible is no 
-more in the way of a Loyal League, than a small corn is 
&n the toe of a strong man. 16 Stephen, surnamed Fos- 
ter, showeth that the Ten Commandments recognize the 
right of slavery. 19 He showeth that Christ endorseth 
the same. 2 1 Abraham is satisfied. 

X And when the King heareth this counsel of his 
faithful, he shall answer them saying, I am persuaded 
of the truth of all that these men of wisdom have 
uttered ; and in the fullness of time it shall be even 
as you desire. 

II. But, as for the present, it is yet too soon to 
Ibreak to the whole world the marvelous things revealed 
) in the divine temple of the Dragon. 
H HI. Have I not already done as much as the peo- 
ple will bear ? Even so let us wait a little, until the 
people get a back strong enough to carry the whole 
load that we shall lay upon it. 

IV. And the King telleth a story of a man who had 



BOOK SECOND. 35 

three sons who had a great desire and knack, withal, 
at killing skunks. 

Y. One day the three Sons addressed their Father at 
five o'clock in the morning, We beseech thee, Father, 
to let us go out into the field and kill skunks. The 
Father said yea ; and they went out, and behold they 
killed six skunks before breakfast, so that all the air, 
for miles round about, was loaded with the suffo- 
cating stink of skunks. 

VI. And at the sixth hour of the day, the three 
Sons again besought their Father to let them go kill- 
ing skunks, and he said yea ; and they went out, and 
killed ten skunks, so that the whole neighborhood 
was choked almost beyond the power of mortals to 
endure. 

VII. And at eventide the three Sons again be- 
sought their Father to let them go killing skunks. 
But this time the old man said, Nay, my boys, you 
have made stink enough for one day, 

VIII. Now behold, O my Friends, have not my 
proclamations made stink enough for the present ; 
and shall we not more wisely wait a little before I ut- 
ter my proclamation against the Bible. 

IX. Verily I say unto you, if the Bible support* 
slavery, educate the people to hate slavery, and then 
you will, with greater ease, persuade them to hate the 
Bible. 

X. Besides, my friends, your King perceiveth that 
the Bible is of no account with them that are willing 
to worship our comely black Idol. 

XI. For has not brother Henry the Naughty, 
proved to us that it is no stumbling block to his feet. 
Even so with our dear brothers, Cheever, Tyng, Vin- 



36 STEPHEN THE PEOPHET. 

ton, Bellows, and almost the whole throng of preach- 
ers — do not they all show that the Bible is as nothing 
to them, whenever it cometh in the way of the doc- 
trines of the comely black Idol. 

XII. What availeth it that they read that the Son 
of man healeth the sick slaves of slave-holders, and 
then pronounceth a benediction npon their masters ? 
or what availeth it, that Paul, the Apostle, teacheth 
slaves to obey their masters, and calleth the slave- 
holders " well beloved brethren ;" verily I say uiito 
you that these ministers will steal a slave and cut his 
master's throat just as readily as though they had 
never read the Bible. 

XIII. Even so you perceive, beloved brethren, that 
the Bible, like a small corn on the toe of a strong 
man, hurteth not much. When we find that it does, 
we shall proclaim against it, and send it headlong 
after the remains of the Constitution which was so 
long its twin bulwark of slavery. 

XIV. But saith the King, after the manner of his 
joking, we will spare the Ten Commandments, in or- 
der that our dear friends, the preachers, may have 
left unto them a few texts to preach from. 

XV. And when Stephen — not he that was stoned, but 
that stoneth all who are not worshipers of the black 
Idol, and whose surname is Foster — heareth the King, 
he shall spring up in great anger and open his mouth, 
with a loud voice, saying — 

XVI. Behold, King, if you spare that accursed 
decalogue which is called the Ten Commandments you 
give up all, and we shall one day be hanged as thieves 
— for know you not that both the Fourth and Tenth 
Commandments include the relation of master and 



BOOK SECOND. 37 

slave, wherein we are forbidden to covet a man's man- 
servant nor his maid-servant ? 

XYII. Verily this admitteth not of doubt. We 
are commanded not to covet what belongeth to an- 
other, that is, what is his property, in the list of 
which things are his man-servant and his maid-ser- 
vant, which we know were slaves, for they belonged to 
Mm. 

XVIII. Now this is a part of the organic law of the 
people of Israel, which it is claimed, God delivered to 
Moses on Mount Sinai. There is no blinking the 
matter — if they are God's Commandments, we are 
forbidden to disturb a man's property in his slaves, 
just as much as we are forbidden to meddle with his 
property in his cattle. This is the law of the Deca- 
logue. God forbid that an anti-slavery man should 
ever stultify himself by admitting such an accursed 
Decalogue to be divine ! 

XIX. Furthermore, men and brethren, Christ most 
fully endorsed and confirmed these odious slave- 
holding laws of the Jews and the Decalogue, for 
he declared that he " came not to destroy but to ful- 
fill " them— yea, he said that " one jot or one tittle 
shall in no wise pass from the law 'till all be fulfilled." 
He makes no exception. He swallowed the Deca- 
logue whole, slavery statute and all. 

XX. Behold therefore, O Abraham, thou must not 
think to put off this matter with thy jokes about 
skunks; for I say unto thee, that if the Bible be the 
Word of God, and thou allowest it to stand, the day 
shall come when we shall be held a generation of 
skunks ; yea, and our very names shall stink in the 
nostrils of men, from generation to generation. 



38 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

XXI. And when Stephen sayeth these things the fc 
King shall tremble, and he shall sit stupified, so that 
the water droppeth from his under lip, for he knoweth 
not which way to turn. 



CHAPTEE IX 



1 A merry- Andrews cometh from a city that hath a frog- 
pond in its centre, with a delegation of a hundred Minis- 
ters. 2 We beseech Abraham to utter a proclamation 
against certain books, 6 They show that the Missionaries 
in Africa lie about the negroes. 13 Horace, the Tribune, 
lieth about the Africans. 17 Showeth that certain books 
must be suppressed or the Woolly -Heads be damned. 19 
The 100 Ministers scream so loud that they split the King's 
ears. 

I. Behold while the King remaineth in these 
straights, a merry-Andrews from that city of the 
East, that hath the frog-pond in the centre thereof, 
ariveth in the city of the Dragon, even in Washing- 
ton, at the head of a delegation of an hundred minis- 
ters from the tribe of the Puritans. 

II. And straightway they go in before the King, 
and, having chosen a spokesman, even one Kirk, who 
celebrateth with the negroes, and maketh himself as 
one of them, standeth down close to the King, and 
beginneth to harrangue, saying — We have come, an 
hundred ministers strong, to beseech thee, O Abraham, 
to utter thy proclamation and suppress all of certain 
mischievious and damnable books, both of histories 
and travels, which reveal the condition of the negro 
in his native land, even in Africa, the place which the 
Lord gave him and made him what he is, even as the 
White man hath his native clime, and inheriteth the 
character which he weareth. 



BOOK SECOND. 39 

III. For know then, that these pestilent books of 
histories and travels, give such an account of the 
idolatrous and damnable state of the negro in his own 
land that persuadeth the people that it were a deed 
of christian charity, yea mercy to take him therefrom 
and bring him even to servitude in Sunland. 

IV. For they say, verily the negro is a thousand 
fold better off even in slavery in Sunland, than in his 
own native country. 

V. Now, let us see what sayeth these books, which 
we would have thee to exterminate by proclamation. 
So be it that they all agreed that the negro hath 
never made one step of improvement, while left to 
himself, without the white man's aid, no, not since the 
beginning of history — verily showing that the race is, 
of its own forces, unimproving, and naturally with- 
out any of the great marks of the Caucasian man, who 
is his master in Sunland. 

Behold how carnel reason then declareth that in- 
stead of its being a wrong to bring the negro from 
his natural beastly state, and place him at service in 
Sunland, it is the greatest blessing that can befall 
him. 

VI. What sayeth even the Rev. John Leighton 
Wilson, a Secretary of the Presbyterian Board of 
Foreign Mission, the same who was for many years 
a missionary in Africa ! Even thus he slandereth 
the poor negro : 

" It is a common remark of the present day, that 
" the heathen world is as depraved now as it was in 
" the days of Paul. But this does not meet the case. 
" It is worse now than it was then. There are but 
" few modern missionaries who cannot testify to the 



40 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

" existence of forms of human depravity among them, 
" of which there is no mention in the Apostle's cate- 
" gory, and of which perhaps there was no existence 
" in his day. . . The depth of infamy and pollu- 
" tion to which the African tribes have already re- 
" duced themselves, can scarcely be conceived." 

Behold how this vile traducer of our comely black 
brethren proceedeth to revile the Lord's anointed — 
for he sayeth that " they worship devils," and then 
goeth on after this fashion : 

"If it be true, and it undoubtedly is, that our 
" moral characters constantly assimilate to the char- 
" acter of the Being we worship, it follows as a neces- 
" sary consequence, that African character has been 
" approximating for centuries to a model the most 
" hideously immoral and depraved the human imagi- 
" nation can conceive. And here is at once the secret 
" cause of all that cunning, duplicity, and cruelty that 
"have ever characterized this people. The linea- 
"ments of the divine image have been effectually 
" effaced from their hearts, whilst those of the spirits 
" of the infernal pit have been drawn with too bold a 
" hand to be mistaken or misapprehended." 

VIII. Moreover, this blaspheming missionary, 
speaking of what his own eyes hath seen, exhibitetli 
our brethren, as 

" Without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful. 
"A mother, for rum or for a few yards of cloth, will 
" sell her child, and a husband will sell his wife. The 
" inhabitants of one village, without having received 
" any provocation, will attack at midnight the sleep- 
" ing inhabitants of a neighboring village, and sell 
" into slavery all whom they can capture, while they 



BOOK SECOND. 41 

" murder every one who resists them, and destroy the 
"village." 

IX. Behold also what sayeth Carnot, who had 
twenty years experience in Africa — he telleth of two 
towns at Digby, governed by two cousins who had 
always lived in harmony, until some slavers established 
a depot for the purchase of slaves in the town of the 
younger cousin, which so offended the elder through 
jealousy that they became at enmity one with the 
other, and immediately put their towns in a state of 
defense. 

X. Now when the slaver came again four months 
afterwards they went to the settlement of the elder 
brother, which produced such rejoicing that they 
danced and caroused until long after midnight, " when 
all stole off to maudlin sleep." Then proceedeth the 
narrative as followeth, in these words : 

"About three o'clock in the morning the sudden 
" screams of women and children and volleys of mus- 
" ketry aroused him. The town was attacked by the 
" younger cousin, aided by bushmen, headed by a fe- 
" rocious scoundrel, who, with his chiefs, were canni- 
° bals, ' and never trod the war path without a pledge 
"to return laden with human flesh to gorge their 
"households. These savages rushed with shouts 
" through the town, murdering every one whom they 
"encountered. After the first massacro was ended 
"and the day had begun, they assembled around 
" their leader at the P alaver House, and there was 
" scarcely one of them who did not bring the body of 
" some maimed and bleeding victim, who were tum- 
" bled on a heap in the centre. Immediately after, 
"a procession of women, whose naked limbs were 



42 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

" smeared with chalk and ochre, poured into the 
" Palaver House to join the beastly rites, each armed 
" with a knife and bearing in her hand some cannibal 
" trophy. Then came the refreshment, in the shape 
" of rum, powder, and blood, which was quaffed by 
61 the brutes till they reeled off with linked hands in 
4i a wild dance around the pile of victims. As the 
"women leaped and sang, the men applauded and 
"encouraged. I forbear to transcribe his account 
" of the revolting scene of lasciviousness and cruelty 
"which followed.*" 

XII. Behold, O King, there is not a book that 
toucheth on this matter that slandereth not after the 
same fashion our comely black brethren — setting 
forth how in their own land they live in holes, and in 
caves of the rock, eating snakes and worms, and even 
eating each other as no beasts of the forest will eat 
their own kind. 

XIII. And even our own brother Horace, thy Ma- 
jesty's Tribune, in a late writing, in his own paper, 
useth his pen after this fashion, to the great shame of 
our holy cause : 

" His Blood-smeared and Mud-smeared Majesty of 
" Dahomey, nitescent in all the glory of green feath- 
" ers and red oche, has recently been pathetically re- 
" quested by a Christian officer to give up that diver- 
" sion of wholesale murder which has for so many 
" ages been the delight of African Boyalty, and has, 
w indeed, constituted the chief charm of Coronations 
" and Funerals in those parts. We regret to say that 
" this Boyal Personage, being of a highly conserva- 
" tive nature, and satisfied that the true happiness of 

•See Carnot, ch 61. 






BOOK SECOND. 4:3 

" his subjects depends upon the killing of a large 
"number of them annually, declines to abandon the 
u venerable custom, as we suppose, both upon political 
"and religious grounds; and has given the benevo- 
" lent remonstrant to undertand that his benevolence 
"is impertinent and untimely. 'I must,' says this 
"fraternal Prince, ' have a certain number of skulls to 
" garnish my stockades withal.' " 

XIV. Behold, shall we destroy our country, and 
murder our countrymen for such a race as this ! O 
King, if so be it that these things are true, how shall 
we say that the African has been wronged by being 
brought into Sunland? For then verily it were a 
mercy if all Africa could be made as well off as the 
wretchedest negro who serves in Sunland ! 

XV. Now, therefore, these books must be de- 
stroyed, yea, all of them, or we are without excuse 
before men. For we know of ourselves that, in the 
country that is called San Domingo, the negro, by 
reason of his emancipation, hath gone back to the re- 
ligion of his native land, and worshipeth the green 
snake, denying the gospel of Christ which he was 
taught and did obey in his servitude !* 

XVI. Now of these books, even of histories, travels, 
and missionary reports, there are many ; yea more 
than a thousand, which are pestilent fountains of in- 
formation for the people ; the same being used by the 
worshipers of White deities to convict us of being 
fools or knaves, to turn the world upside down about 
nothing, and to deluge the land with the blood of our 
kindred, in the main effort to make the negro even 
that which Jehovah hath denied him the power to 
be! 

•See Report of the London Baptist Missionary Society. 



4A STEPHEN THE PBOPHET. 

XYII. Verily, O King, these books must be sup- 
pressed, and the mouths of such as have read them 
and wickedly repeat the same, must be stopped ; elso 
we, of all men, shall receiye the greater damnation. 

XVIII. Therefore we beseech thee to utter thy 
deadly proclamation against them. Proclaim them 
to be lies. Make thou the travelers, the historians, 
and the missionaries all to be liars, so that we may 
silence the idolatrous nation that worshipeth at the 
altars of the White deities. 

XIX. Lo, when the spokesman uttereth these say- 
ings, all the other ninety and nine ministers shall cry 
out with a loud voice Amen I so that the King think- 
eth the drum of his ears to be cracked. 

XX. Then each one of the hundred ministers shall 
shake hands with Abram ; and thereafter they shall 
all return to the land of the Puritans, the chief city of 
which hath the frog-pond in the centre, of the which 
its inhabitants are so proud that they sing songs 
about it continually. 



CHAPTEE X. 



1 Abraham is overwhelmed by Committees. 2 The Doctor 
driveth them away by spreading that the King hath the 
Small-Pox. 7 A Committee of Ministers goeth to the 
King to ask a Proclamation to put Blacks and Whites to 
bed together. 8 The King refuseth. 9 He showeth that 
this Good Work is already provided for. 11 Hedeclareth 
that Copperheads shall not mix with the Wenches. He 
wanteth a pure breed of Negroes and Loyal Leaguers. 
16 One Vinton trieth to kiss the King's toe. 

I. Now, Abraham shall grow more and more op- 
pressed day by day, by reason of the Committees that 



BOOK SECOND. 45 

come before him demanding proclamations. So great 
an anxiety shall prey upon his peace of mind that it 
throweth him into a spotted fever which the doctors 
think to be small-pox, and thereby a great alarm 
spreadeth among the Woolly-Heads from one end of 
the land to the other. 

II. And when the King at last findeth himself to be 
getting well, he shall begin to dread the Committees, 
and he shall say to his physician, Doctor, do thou 
give that which shall sicken me again, that I may be 
kept even here out of the reach of the Committees ; 
for of a truth I perceive that they will kill me. 

III. And the Doctor shall spread abroad a report 
that the King hath a relapse, and that the small-pox 
spreadeth alarmingly throughout the city, so that ten 
thousand committee-men that came to see the King 
shall suddenly flee back to their homes whence they 
came. 

IV. And Abraham shall laugh at the cunning trick 
which his physician putteth upon the Committee-men. 
But verily I say unto you that hitf joy shall be short, 
for soon there cometh a Committee which will not be 
put off, for they would speak with the King about a 
matter that is like life and death unto them. 

V. So when Abraham perceiveth that they will not 
be turned away, he giveth himself up to his fate, and 
receiveth them. 

YI. And they shall come in unto him, a great 
throng ; the chief leader being one Theodore, sur- 
named Tilton, and a certain Divine, who is called 
Bellows because he bloweth much, and that Stephen 
who is called Tyng, because he goeth on, ting-a-ling, 
like a bell continually about everything, and one 



46 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

Vinton, called the sour-faced, because he vainly trieth 
to put on a godly look when he prayeth, for by these 
means he getteth a living, and among them also com- 
eth Henry Ward, the Naughty, the same who afore- 
time harrangued the King about the Bible. 

VII. And when these shall stand before Abraham, 
the man Theodore shall open his mouth saying : We 
have come, great and mighty Monarch, to ask of thee 
a proclamation declaring the prejudice against people 
of color to be unreasonable and sinful ; and also to 
make it proper and fitting for a white man to go with 
a black woman, and for a white woman to go with a 
black man, that they may miscegnate one with another, 
whereby a new and improved type of the American 
man may be produced. 

VIII. Then Abraham shall answer them, Where- 
fore do you ask me to establish by proclamation what 
is going on well enough already ! For have not my 
Generals and my Chaplains in the army done this 
thing to an amazing extent? Moreover, during my 
reign, have not five thousand of this improved tpye 
of the American man been born in this our beloved 
city alone ? 

IX. What would ye ? Have I not sent ministers 
and school-teachers, and a whole army of so-called 
agents, to follow up the success of our legions, whose 
business it is, not only to teach the old contrabands* 
but to miscegnate with the younger, that they may 
raise up a new generation of the American man ! 

X. Moreover, you learned and pious men, do you 
not show that you understand, and have no cloubV^ 
tasted, the benefits of miscegnation with the comely 
daughters of Ethiopia ? And have we not good news 



BOOK SECOND. 17 

from every part of our kingdom that the good work 
is going on well, in as much as our Loyal Leagues 
are all devoted to the same great and glorious end ? 

XI. Then they shall answer the King, even as thou 
sayest, so it is true ; but the Copperheads are a stiff- 
necked and a proud people, who not only refuse to 
mix in our perfect and loving equality with the blacks, 
but they wickedly laugh and sneer at us withal. 

XII. And the King shall say, "What ! would ye 
have the veins of our new and improved generation 
poisoned with the blood of the Copperheads ? Verily 
no ! Unto you of the Loyal Leagues, belongeth the 
happy monopoly of miscegnation with the blacks, and 
would ye share it with Copperheads? Not if the 
court understand herself, as she thinks she do. 

XIII. Then they shall answer, saying, But the 
Copperheads are men given to the subtlety of science, 
who publish many books to show that the offspring 
of the blacks and whites run out after the third gener- 
ation, so that they cannot propagate their species, the 
which, if the people believe it, showeth that they are 
not of one race, and that at last our new and im- 
proved type of the American man would become ex- 
tinct, so that we should have no posterity in the land 
of our fathers? 

XIV. And Abraham shall answer them, Now why 
trouble yourselves about posterity? What has pos- 
terity ever done for us, that we should sacrifice our 
happiness in its behalf ? Verily I say unto you that 
long enough before the time of three generations, we 
shall be done with the country, and let those who 
follow us do the best they can with what we leave, 
even as we will make the best thing we can for our- 
selves in our day and generation. 



48 STEPHEN THE PROPHET. 

XY. Then the Committee shall look one in the face 
of another, and say among themselves, The King 
speaketh wisely, and as beseemeth a patriot ; therefore 
let us retire, even to our own houses, and follow the 
council of the King, and let the Copperheads content 
themselves with the foolishness of science, and hug 
themselves with the proud memories of their ances- 
tors ; but as for us, we will make ourselves merry with 
greenbacks, and with the fragrant daughters of 
Ethiopia. 

XVI. But before they retire from the presence of 
the King they shall, one after another, kneel before 
him, to kiss his hand ; and one, even the man who is 
called Vinton the Sour-faced, shall entreat the pleas- 
ure of kissing the King's toe ; but when Abraham 
seeth what a face he hath, he shall decline, for the 
reason that he hath on dirty stockings, saying, My 
wife hath not been at home for these two months, so 
that my household fixings are, even as the rebel 
army, which is, telegraphically, in a demoralized con- 
dition. 

XVII. Here endeth the Second Book of the 
Prophet Stephen, Son of Douglas. 




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uni 



M> %J> K JBl m 



STEPHEN, 

Son of Dou?las. 






"Wherein ma.vellous things are foretold of the reign 
of Abraham. 






PUBLISHER AM) BOOKSELLER, 

I tEET, y . V. 









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